c/s- the AFTER effects that you never knew

[maz]

QUOTE=Nadine216 ATM horror c/s are all the rage, because we are realising that normal birth is actually better, kwim?? And what better way to change ppl's minds than making c/s bad, horrific and shamefull - elective or not that is the feeling going around - not just here, everywhere.


honey that is not my intention of this thread atall and im sorry if it has felt that way to you or anyone else. I apologise if I have upset anyone with what I have posted.

to be honest this is your first c/s and your only in the early days so to speak. Power to you that you feel fantastic about having your c/s. I so wish that is how I felt. I admire your strength and the fact your standing up and letting us know a GOOD outcome.

I have had 4 c/s.....5 if you include my tubual reversal.
My first one was ok...emergency,
my second was not as painful,
my tubual reversal..god we wont even go there
number 3 - well I felt like I had gone to sleep and woken up and just had a baby planted in my arms...i had no pain until the 10 week mark.
my 4th.....it was the icing on the cake. I had my tubes removed thankfully

My MAIN reason for starting this thread - was to open a few peoples eyes on the LONG TERM side effects. I honestly believe they are to often brushed over and forgotten in the process of raising your baby. As I said in a previous post - its almost a TABO subject speaking out about the pains...pyhsically and emotional. Just look at the amount of people who have posted in here. I think it is so sad and upsetting that we arent able to be upfront and voice our opinions about this without being black branded to some point.

nadine - maybe you start a start a POSITIVE thread for c/s.....empower some women to come out of the shadows and show their good c/s experiences.

Its with information likes ours that helps other woman in limbo

[christy]

Here Here Maz.

Nadine not to have a go, but this thread wasn't started as a c/s bashing thread. I didn't take it that way. Just that alot of times the post effects of a c/s aren't explained. I know on my way to theatre in the emergency c/s they didn't say "oh btw... did you know you will have a drain put in and it will stay in for 24 hours and cause internal scarring that will be painful for years to come?" Honestly, at that point of time, I didn't care.

The other thing about c/s that annoy me is that they don't explain what else could happen to your baby. Did you know that there is a higher incidence of reflux in c/s babies? The babies themselves haven't gone through the birth process which squeezes their bodies in certain places which helps kick start their lives.

[Phteven]

On the subject of good c-section experiences - I had a 'good' c-section. My midwife debreifed while I was waiting for theatre, I walked out of the hospital in 3 days, I healed fast and and I have a barely visible scar that never gives me pain . I also had a long and difficult/'bad' vaginal birth and having had both, if I were ever to birth again I wouldn't hesitate to chose the vaginal birth.
Not just for my sake but for my babies'. Yasin was the picture of health after he was born. Poor little Imran had awful phlegm problems because it hadn't been squeezed out in labour and spent his first 48 hours trying to cough the stuff up. It broke my heart.
Imran wasn't coming out without a c-section so I'm at peace with having it but I would never voluntarily undergo one if I could have a vaginal birth.

[BellyBelly]

And you gotta remember, the media are pros at sensationalising. I was on a current affair with Pinky about a co-sleeping article and they didn't tell us they were presenting the other side - a forensic scientist talking about dead babies from co-sleeping (they didn't mention that most babies that died co-sleeping did so from mothers sleeping on the couch with babies, mother smoking, being obese - yet the media run with sensationalism). So it might sound worse than it is. I think everyone on BB is well behaved but the media has much to answer for creating much hype and judgement. Just don't watch those stupid current affairs shows!

[~mamaspice~]

yes, the media is good for that. I remember seeing a Current Affair story about a mum losing her baby and her uterus because of uterine rupture and acusing the hospital of a cover-up. Very very sad for the family, but I'm sure it unnecessarily scared potential VBAC mums and also some health providers. Where in the story did they mention that induced first time mums have a greater risk of rupture than VBAC mums?

BTW, it's interresting that some of you had a drain in your incision after the OP. I didn't. I was stapled up with a steristrip placed over the wound and 4 days post Op the staples were removed and the outer layers of skin had completely healed.

back to Sushee's comment about how many people in her ante-natal class opted for caesars. Well there were 10 couples in our class too. Only one decided on an elective caesar for no real medical reason. She was an older first time mum of an IVF bub and her OB recomended the caesar and she was happy to go along with it. The rest of us were hoping for natural births, however 6 out of 10 of us did end up having caesar for various reasons - but that's another story . . .

[Nadine216]

Oh my, NO MAZ!! I did not mean you are only posting this, because you wanted to cause a hype. (with here I was refering to the internet/media/TV - strangely I am seeing c/s stories EVERYWHERE) I KNOW that this is your personal experiance and your own feelings and your own warning to other women. Much the same as I would do about nipple shields (WHOLE other story and besides the point) You did not upset me at all, I just wanted to say that I did not experiance my c/s as bad. And yes, it can certianly be because that was my first. My next one (don't have a choice ) could end up Nightmare-on-Elimstreet-Horror. Then we can do some serious mud-flinging together

Quote [Its with information likes ours that helps other woman in limbo]
Exactly, that is why I thought it a good? idea to post. Just to tell women who HAD NO CHOICE that it is not ALL BAD, kwim?

Chirsty - I did not take this as a c/s bashing thread. I get what you are saying. I did not know ANYTHING about c/s (expect that they cut you open) until AFTER I was released from the hospital. There was no time to exlpain it to me and even thought I knew I HAD to HAVE a c/s 10 days prior, I did not really worry about that. There was other worries on my mind ... like my baby's health. And like you said .. in an emergency you don't really care. You just want your baby safe and healthy, bugger what it does to you. I wonder if that is not why women don't talk about c/s?? Because they feel that it was their "choice" and they are not allowed to whine about the after pain, kwim??
And yeah, I did know about the reflux. Scared to death this little bug will also be a colic baby. It's darn tuff.

Dachlostar - If I had a option for VBAC, I'll take it ... in the blink of an eye. I'll even take two

Kelly - I think you have hit the spot. Sensation. Just talking bad and ouch and evil ... gets attention, makes ppl talk, change ppl's perception of stuff. And NOT saying something helps that along, like you explain with the co-sleeping deaths. I agree that we are well behaved. I did not mean to offend maz or anyone else for that matter. Again I just wanted to say I liked my c/s .... so far (right, maz )

I think the thing for me could be the ELECTIVE in c/s. I did not elect it, so I am making the best of a "bad" situation. I am just so sorry for the mom who have her heart set on a VB and ends up being scared to death, after following a c/s media hype, when an ob tells her she has to have and emergency c/s. I think it's human. If you go for a CAT-scan, it's human to think the worst, while trying to stay positive.
I did not know the after effects then, I do know them now. I am terrified that things will not go as smooth as the first time.

Thanks for a great thread.

[BellyBelly]

The medical profession needs to change its language alot... take away the blame / failure of women's bodies, like failure to progress, inadequate this, slow that, yada yada... blame the woman not the rest of it!

[maz]

Here, here Kelly...then people might start to understand more (fingers corssed)

Nadine - Matie, I think you are wonderful for bringing up the positives to. PMSL that we thought we both offended each other...if only you could see my face IRL then you'd know everything is hunky dorry babe.

[sushee]

Charli'smumma,

yeah I was shocked by the desire for elective c/s in my class too, as when I had my 3 older kids, it was not the norm at all. Of course, with Charlie, I went to a private hospital, where I had my first 3 at a public hospital, and I assume that made all the difference.

What is worrying though is that in my class of 10, 8 ended up having c/s, and in your class, 6 (or 7?) out of 10 did too. That's a pretty extraordinarily high percentage of women who apparently 'couldn't' have vaginal births, don't you think?

[SamanthaP]

Charli'smumma,

yeah I was shocked by the desire for elective c/s in my class too, as when I had my 3 older kids, it was not the norm at all. Of course, with Charlie, I went to a private hospital, where I had my first 3 at a public hospital, and I assume that made all the difference.

What is worrying though is that in my class of 10, 8 ended up having c/s, and in your class, 6 (or 7?) out of 10 did too. That's a pretty extraordinarily high percentage of women who apparently 'couldn't' have vaginal births, don't you think?

Sushee your last sentence hits it on the head. That's exactly the problem. And for the billionth time I've said this here I think, it's not the women, it's the doctors who are telling them they 'have to have' a caesarean section. A very small proportion of women choose to have elective caesareans. Most are told they need them because of high heads, small pelvis, etc etc etc., however women also need to take responsibility for their choices too. While healthy low-risk women continue to choose inappropriate caregivers for the pregnancy and birth, the section rate will continue to climb. It's that simple. Hire a lawyer, get legal advice. Hire a Surgeon, get surgery.

Peace, out

[Gigi]

Thank you darling Maz for saying what really needs to be said

The stuff that no-one tells you when you're pregnant and NEED to know this kind of stuff, the real life stuff.

i had an emergency c-section (ambulance, the whole nine yards), after 30 hours of kneeling in a waterpool at home, trying to have a home birth.

the c-section was a big shock, very traumatic for me, and the side effects were long lasting.

as soon as my baby was out and breathing (after immediate resus), i felt like the world was "i wanna look at the baby - your major abdominal surgery was nothing, hurry up and stop lying in bed".

you've only had a c-section
loads of women have a c-section and are doing everything normally in no time

well that six weeks, no driving thing? i needed longer than that to be able to drive

i could not get up from a lying position by myself
so when dh went back to work, i was too scared to ever lie down when he wasn't there, cos i had no way to get back up unassisted.
he had to lift me 1cm at a time, like a dead weight, with me letting out yelps, screams and big groans every centimetre of the way up - it took a few minutes to get me up from the bed.

i wasn't well enough to leave the house by myself with my bub, until about the nine month mark.

leaving the house with a health worker, to take me to physio appointments, that was really hard, painful and tiring.

all this happening, while i am 100% responsible for a newborn, when dh is at work most of the time - i have no idea how single parents cope - i struggled so much, and i had dh at night and weekends.

so much pain, and a nb to deal with, i just did the bare essentials of life - everything else went to hell in a hand basket.

having to clutch walls to walk, hang onto furniture to get around the room. Shuffle to the loo like a 90 year old. no-one told me the side effects would be so far reaching.

i tried for 30 hours to have a natural waterbirth at home, i know i did my best, but i still feel very upset about all of this.

i also hate knowing my levels of pain made it so hard to enjoy my new baby and care for her, the way i would have liked to. She didn't get to go outside, get taken to parks, enjoy the air, be at playgroups - all because her mum wasn't well enough to go anywhere.

i take bending, getting up and down by myself, i am so grateful for it now.

Those stomach muscles are SOOO important for your flexibility and well being.

well done Maz for putting a spotlight on an operation that is so casually thought of, like it's nothing. It might be for some, but not all.

[*Efjay*]

I myself have never had a c/section. I hope & pray that I never need one.
Some many people are to quick to assume that you did because you are too posh to push. I recently read a thread on another forum about this. The hurtful "well meaning" comments that some c/section mums get are unbelievable. Yes ok, some mums out there could have had a VB with the right support etc. ut untill you know the reasons behind that person need for c/section people really should keep it too themselves about how "they could have, if only"
Good on you all for setting the record straight.
To Posh to Push..... Pfht yeah right!

[BellyBelly]

There are actually studies about this and its shown that the percent of women 'too posh to push' is very low, something around 1% I think but definitely no more than 5% having a c/s. The rest were for other reasons.

[*Efjay*]

Its amazing hey, the numbers show it isn't so yet we still hear it all the time

[Sammiejane]

I love this thread - is there anyway to force women to read it???

I cried when i was told i would have to have a C/S and am suffereing many of the after effects that you listed...

I heard the GUNT term a month ago and p*ssed myself laughing!!!

the day after my c/s 5 women were booked in foe elective c/s... these women also dumped thier babies evey night with the nurses at 10pm and picked them up at 7am so the couuld sleep... the often also left their babies with the nurses during the day so they could do coffee!!!
i wonderedwhy they even had babies, molly was with me the whole time... i think that 1% were all at my hospital

[Trish]

I know a girl who has had 2 babies, pretty close together. A couple of nights before Abbey was born I was out and seh was there. She'd just had a baby herself. I asked her how she got away without her brand new baby (about 3 weeks old) She told me they babies were at home with her husband. She then bragged how she had 2 babies and never even knew what a contraction felt like. She had elective c sections and put her babies onto a bottle as son as they were born.

You can not believe how much this saddens me. To this day these little girls are dumped whenever and whereever they can be. Don't get me wrong, they are loved and well looked after, clean and dressed beautifully. They will never want for anything financially. Just perhaps some time with their parents.....

[Astrid]

Well I have more to add since having had a 2nd emergency c-section.

Painkillers - sound like fun, but are not. The good ones make me feel to woozy to cope (not good with a new bubs) and cause constipation. The other which I can take causes diarrhoea. Neither are fun after major surgery. So basically I have had to deal with minimal pain relief.

Constipation - combo of the surgery and pain killers, I was horrendously constipated, I needed major intervention (enema and oral laxatives), it was so painful I was considering asking for an epidural. Not fun being trapped on a toilet whilst your bubs screams for you.