2 year old at birth

[Matryoshka]

I really want my son to be at the birth. First we had thought it wasn't a good idea as he is very sensitive especially if i am in pain or crying - he has burst in to tears before when he's seen me hurt myself. But as he's gotten older, he seems to be maturing in that sense and recently comforted me when i was crying rather than reacting in fear. So i think he is understanding pain and emotions.

We are never apart, and very close. I just can't imagine being away from him for the birth. I did plan to have him in another room with my MIL, but i'd really like him to be with me. I am hoping to birth much quieter than last time (though i wasn't really vocal until the pushing stage). I think if i am moaning loudly it will scare him, but i've done more research this time and i'm hoping to avoid that and focus more on the breathing (easier said than done but i'm more aware than last time).

Has anyone had their little one at the birth? how much of it? how did it go?

[The[cookie]Doctor]

Hey there MummaB

You might find this article of use...
https://www.bellybelly.com.au/birth/siblings-at-birth

My mum had my 15 & 10 year old brother at the birth of the twins and it went great for her, but there is quite a substantial age difference so i guess not much comparison! I can tell you though the boys were proud as punch to say they'd seen a real live birth, they found it quite impressive.

Hope you can get some better answers from others!

[{sarah}]

Read books with him to prepare him maybe? There are some out there that talk about mummy making noises & what happens during the birth. They might help to prepare him for what's going to happen. Otherwise, have MIL handy so if he gets distressed she can take him & explain what's happening etc.

[Trish]

Abbey was born at home in November just gone. My then 2 year 8 month daughter was awake to see it. She woke when Abbey was crowning (I wonder why) and sat there wide eyed watching as she was born. She wasn't at all distressed. She has watched the video of her birth several times earlier though so perhaps she was already aware of what was happening.

I say go for it. As long as you have someone to be your childs support person incase it gets abit much for them.

Goodluck with your upcoming birth

[Ellibam]

makon was 22 months and he was at the birth( i wanted him in the room but it happened very quickly) he came in just as i was pulling her out of the water.
my MIl was his support person so she ot him breakfast and went for a walk with him!
he would come up to me and say 'mummy ok?' and i always said yes mummy is just making noises to get baby out!
we did a little bit of build up before the birth! i thjink that is why there is no rivallry/jealousy cos he was there! i didnt go away and come back with a screaming baby!

[Matryoshka]

So i could watch online birthing videos with him perhaps?

I'm so glad to hear others have done it!

[Trish]

Oh for sure MummaB. I would watch it first to make sure it was suitable of course. And sit and explain as it happens. Maybe even some non graffic pictures would help explain it.

Oh, a thought, there are a few montages of birth here on BB (mine included) perhaps you could show him some of those ???

[Matryoshka]

Good idea Trish, that would be a better place to start. I've seen yours as well and it looked very peaceful

[Trish]

Thanks and no worries

[*Ang*]

Just looking at it from a different perspective, and bearing in mind I havent had a 2 year old at a birth, my initial thoughts when reading your thread was that "wouldnt a 2 year old be distracting"? I suppose I am thinking along the lines of kids that age unable to sit still, keep quiet etc for long periods of time and I am wondering whether you when trying to concentrate on the birth that you want would become concerned/distracted by Lucas's wants and needs. Especially since you are not giving birth in your own home where Lucas will be free to wander.

I am not saying that you shouldnt have him there, in fact it would be a lovely bonding experience for you all, I am just suggesting look at it from a practical perspective.

Incidentally at age 13 I witnessed my sister's birth and was very overwhelmed by it all.

[Lulu]

Its funny really Gabymum, I always thought the same thing but everytime I read about young siblings at birth it seems they really take it in their stride, and seems so natural they are there.
I suppose it depends on the child themselves too.

[Trish]

I guess for me it helped that it was early hours of the morning. We hadn't actually planned for the kids to be awake but when Teh woke up and walked out she was more than happy to sit there wide eyed and watch. She was suprisingly quiet too. And this is a kid that never sits down and shuts up. LOL.

[Matryoshka]

I guess it depends on the 2 year old, i have a very placid and thoughtful almost 2 year old and people always comment on how calm he is. He will sit with me if i ask him to (quietly) and follows instructions really well. Sure he is passionate when he wants to do something but overall very easy to be around - i can take him pretty much anywhere without issues (ie, he doesn't run away, doesn't touch things if i tell him not to etc).

But that being said, we would have someone there who's role is to take care of him and his needs, so i think if it became appropriate we would just have him leave the room. So i guess we'll just have to play it by ear?