No advice for you as far as your hemorrhoid query goes, but can only add my thoughts if you're embarrassed about DH seeing something you don't want him to. Keep him up the head of the bed if you find you're on your back - once bub is delivered and the cord is to be cut, I'm pretty sure you'll find yourself a little more covered up, or at least your legs won't be all akimbo. You can close 'em again Of course, you may birth standing up or kneeling ... even less for him to see, I'd imagine. Lots of options if they work for you.

And if you do choose a natural birth and you want a mirror placed where you can see bub emerging, I promise you, they'll angle it so you'll only see the "good" stuff. At least, that's what I found. DH said he saw nuthin' yucky - over and above me giving birth, anyway!!

As for you following in your mum's footsteps, I'm not so sure. While natural birthing itself hasn't changed much in a gazillion years, the ways in which we're able to now birth surely have. It wasn't that long ago that our mums and grandmothers - generally speaking - only birthed on their back while laying in bed. I suspect that doesn't speed things up much. Maybe ask your mum how she did it?

I agree with the other gals, chat to your midwife - I'm sure she'll allay your concerns.
Good luck with things.