ok as a forewarning, i think this may be long...

Scenario:

we are currently planning to have a home birth. im not due til early feb 2011, so i still have awhile yet.

Question 1:

Is it normal for an IM to have 5 births in one month? (not sure how many for the following one) and the last birth for that month is less than 2 weeks before the next in the following month?


Question 2:
(this is more of the advice section)

For those who dont know, recently, as in the past 4 days or so, i have been experiencing SEVERE hip pain (to read more about it, see THIS thread: https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...ce-149439.html)

so, we are thinking, if i am in this much pain at 29/30 weeks.. i honestly dont know IF i am going to be able to last anywhere from another 7 weeks to another 12 weeks... And, at least if the pain gets to the point where i REALLY cant take it anymore, i have the option of asking to be induced by the doctors at the hospital (however if i have a hospital birth, i will still be trying to wait as much as possible to have labour come on naturally and birth naturally, etc. its more just the security of having that option, ITMS?)
But i am getting really offended at people who are REALLY pro-homebirth (nothing wrong with that, but the people i am talking to honestly dont seem to understand my pain atm) saying to me "oh live with it, you have to cook that baby as long as possible, etc. etc. and i WILL be waiting til AT LEAST 37 weeks if i were to be induced anyway by choice, i would put up with the pain for that long, unless she wanted to come earlier on her own, its not like i want to be induced in the next 4 weeks because i cant handle the pain! i dont want my baby in the NICU or SCU for my comfort!
its just SO SO hard when people are telling me its "normal" and basically im over-dramatising it, and telling me to suck it up, when it hurts SO much!!
Surely I shouldn't have to suffer so much physically, mentally and emotionally so much if I really can't handle it... For the sake of a couple weeks if she's already at term. That wouldn't be doing bubs any favors either I imagine if I'm so stressed and not in a good place?

and i know, we could still plan for a homebirth, and if it comes to that point where i cant handle the pain, then cross that bridge then, but the thing is, we would still then be paying over $3,500 for an IM whose services we really didnt get to use much, and we just dont have that sort of money to throw away! thats ALOT of money to us (as well as everyone else im sure), so that makes us reluctant to do it that way, because if we cancel after 37/38 weeks, that will be the scenario, whereas if we cancel now, all we have to pay for are the visits she's given us so far.

and also what bothers both DH & I now, is question 1.... i just found out that our midwife has 5 births booked for January!!!! only one of which i know the due date for, the 30th.. and im due the 11th feb! and the midwife is expecting her to go over.. which to me is rather.. well.. un-reassuring that she may make it to our birth..
i dont know all the other due dates, but What if they go over? What if i go early? How many does she have booked for Feb?!
and on the contract for the home birth, it says that if she cant make it to the birth, we still have to pay the full fee, which to me seems very unfair that we dont get a reduction because she cant attend because shes at another birth... and essentially we pay $3,500 for a public hospy birth.. (if it was because i dialated to quickly or something, i understand that completely in that case though)

and because this is my first birth, i dont know if im likely to go over, go early, etc. an estimate (however accurate it may be) that other mothers have!

i guess, i dont know..
i dont know whether this is common practise for IM's, and, to be honest, i dont know that if i talk to her about all this, what she can really say?
She can't guarantee she WILL be there...
I mean there's not even that guarantee even if i was the only birth for a month either side of my due date really (which i know is unrealistic)! but there's even LESS with the possiblity of more than 5 births before mine, as well as i dont know how many around/after mine too!
Of course she will try her best to be there..
Of course she will try her best to convince me to stay with her..

So i dont really know if me talking to her will really help the situation? (correct me if i'm wrong?) As i feel its something that DH & I have to decide on as there's not much she can really say that we're not expecting?

and i honestly DO want a homebirth, i love the idea of water birth, and birthing naturally, and having my DH & baby girl in our own bed straight after, etc. but given the circumstances with the pain in my hips, and the amount of births surrounding mine with my IM, im not sure if its wise to continue ahead with it, for the simple fact i dont know if it will happen that way, if i chose it?

i just need advice...

has this happened to you? (any of it?)
is it really possible to have a natural (or at least MOSTLY natural) hospy birth?

please help... DH & I are just so confused, and we are constantly being pushed and pulled different ways by people who are REALLY pro-homebirth, and REALLY pro-hospital birth (nothing wrong with that, but we just need a more neutral decision for the circumstances, and the people we seem to be talking to, ONLY seem to be seeing it completely one-sided)
it just seems that everything we've been hoping for these past 6 months have gone to **** and nothing is going right..

im sorry if this is all over the place and a ramble.. i just need advice and not sure where to start...