I say if you feel your DD will be ok, then go for it! I would love Oskar to be there for this one, we will see what happens as things get closer and decide then. We may have no option anyway as we don't have family nearby to come and look after him. I think being scared is something we can "instill" if that makes sense?? For example, thunder... Oskar thinks it's funny and laughs because of the way we've always been with him about it and not made it to be a big thing but made it a funny or fun thing. They do understand a LOT more than we give them credit for! All the best hun!
I just want to add its important - necessary to have a support person for the child/children. Someone trusted who is okay with the whole birthing procdss. A person who is likely to panic, or have a negative response is not the right person to have with you in your sacred space....
If you are having your baby in a hospital/birthing centre take your child/ren often so it becomes a very familiar place - this will help to keep them feeling comfortable.
My DD was 5 1/2 when her 1st sibling was birthed. She was fine - again tho she was very familiar with birth (her second birth really as once she had to tag along with me!) she fetched water, reported what my peri was doing... and generally kept busy. My DD4 I was breast feeding her sister - all the kids were in and out of the birthing pool during my labour. DD5 thinks all babies are born in pools!
Flowerchild, thank you so so much for sharing the photos. They are amazing. It looks like a wonderful experience and your children are just gorgeous. Your photos make me want to have DD involved even more.
Thanks to everyone else for your comments and thoughts. It really makes a difference to get people's support on an issue that is surprisingly controversial.
I do agree that it is important to have a support person for the child, especially one as young as 2. I do think my mum would make a good support person as she really is supportive of natural and water births. Birth doesn't make her anxious at all, she sees it as a wonderful natural experience. She has had 2 uncomplicated natural births herself and she and her brothers were all born at home. So I don't think she would make DD anxious or fearful. She was really calm during DD's birth. And although I didn't need her help (or anybody else's for that matter), it was good to have her there, cheering me on.
We are hoping to have our little ones at the birth of Boris, depending on the time. If it is in the wee hours, we will probably wake up Molly, if not Olivia; Molly is certainly very excited about it.
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and generally kept busy. My DD4 I was breast feeding her sister - all the kids were in and out of the birthing pool during my labour. DD5 thinks all babies are born in pools! 
) - I'd really like to have DS at his sibling's birth.
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