For those who didn't tear - what position did you birth in?

[Julie Doula]

Gothmum, you did good to be so assertive in a situation like that when most women would feel quite vulnerable. Sounds like there was no need whatsoever for you to be hurried up - quite the opposite! You did well to (ahem) kick away the unhelpful advice, stick to your guns and go at your own pace. Sheesh if a 4 hour primip labour is "taking too long" what hope is there??

I agree with you that being unmedicated (ideally) helps you manage the pain better, keep your freedom of movement and use of gravity, and avoid tearing because you can feel what's going on and 'listen' to your body.

[Inertia]

ITA with the idea that being unmedicated helps with tearing. If it hurt too much then like with everything else, you stop what you are doing. I have always had the philosophy that all pain is good. I mean, if i stuck my hand on a burning hotplate without realising, the pain would make me notice and I'd remove it again quick. If it were not for the pain, I'd have a cooked hand, iykwim. So I am not really one to go for numbing pain because it tells me my limits. Such as if my ankle hurts to put weigtht on it, then dont cover the pain.. just dont put weight on it!

Just a different perspective on pain and Pain relief for people.

Unless its an ear infection or tooth ache, there are no limits to be breached with those buggers. Just hand me the doxylamine and back away slowly!

[Julie Doula]

Just hand me the doxylamine and back away slowly!

Love your username, Inertia. Sounds like an Asterix/Obelix name!

[Inertia]

Love your username, Inertia. Sounds like an Asterix/Obelix name!

It reminds me that no matter how much I want to stop, life insists on pushing me along for the ride.

[BekZ]

Great thread ladies. Very interesting reading.

I tore both times and I am hoping not to tear this time

[TwinsMummy]

I layed in my back and didnt tear but i massaged my perinium a week before birth... helped relax so i didnt tear.

[Gabi]

I delivered on my side and I didn't tear.

I put it down to the speed of delivery (ie slowly and controlled) and a good pelvic floor.