OK, so I FINALLY admit it... I felt ripped off & as though I ripped off my DD by having a CS because she was frank breach (bum 1st then head & feet out last together) and I still feel this way.
At my 1st ob appointment, he sugested a VBAC & said there was no reason for another CS & wouldn't give me one unless absolutely necessary. This scared the absolute bjeevias out of me & I stewed on it for the next month until I saw my ob again & demanded another CS. He agreed cause I obviously had somewhat of a fear of all the extra risks?? but still said I can change my mind at any time and try a vbac.... I said "ok, at this stage I want a cs but will keep an open mind towards a vbac".

At 1st all the fear & worry left me... but thoughts of DD's birth & DS's birth have been coming back to haunt me. I remember how proud I felt after DS' birth that I did it on my own even though all the other mothers on the ward kept telling me to not be a hero & take all the drugs, drip induction over 2 days after my waters broke & the fact the ob I got stuck with was a saddist! & then theres how I felt after DD's birth & how it was such a peaceful, quick experience & I enjoyed every minute of it... everything went perfectly, couldn't have asked for a better experience.... but then when I saw how little she was, I thought to my self, oh no, what have I done? I could have pushed that out, frank breach & all!
I admit I have been battling PND & masking it as being stressed (about DH having to close our business down & not having an income for over a year now & how on earth am I going to get even the few things I need for this new bub) & tired from being both pregn & having a bub that rarely sleeps through a night. but yes, ok I admit it, I was depressed, and struggling to cope.

So the 1st step of admitting it is over & now I'm trying to empower myself to turn things around! I want to give a VBAC a go even if I don't succeed, atleast I've tried and I didn't just give up without even trying in the 1st place ykwim?
So, DS was induced after waters breaking over 2 days before at 42 weeks (he just didn't want to come out!) so I'm worried about not going into labour naturally, they can't induce me cause of DD's previous CS, so I've got to do LOTS of reasearch on natural remedies ect... but I'm also worried about this bub ending up breach also. Does anyone know how to get bub in the right position for birth? There has to be something I can start doing now before she gets too big & stuck like DD did.

I've had to argue with the women in the family because they all say if you have 1 cs, all the other births have to be CS also... (yeah well I know differently!) So I have NO support IRL (except DH & ob) so BB is my best friend lately to gain encouragement from others who have been through a VBAC, and I thank you all!

Sorry for the long dragged out days of my life drama but needed to explain & get it out too I suppose. I'd really love & appreciate all the advice I can get, specifically on how to get bub head down. I won't dragg out all the info on natural induction, theres already lots of info in other topics about that!

Thanks for taking your time reading my saga, I know there are much more interesting topics in here