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thread: why we feel pain in labor and pain relief methods

  1. #145
    Registered User

    Oct 2006
    Gold Coast, Queensland
    945

    Blackduckies:

    Well, sometimes things just don't work out the way they should. i know this is not going to be helpful at all. But it's like the person who always ate a healthy diet, did lots of exercise, never smoked or drank and dies of a heart attack at age 42. Sometimes, things are just out of our control. And that is a really difficult concept to grasp.

    I am sorry you had such a hard time. But your bubba being posterior might have had a whole lot to do with it. I can guarantee you that there is nothing wrong with you. All we can do is try our best to set ourselves up for the kind of birth we want. After that, it's out of our hands. You ndid what you could.

    I have a friend who tried her very best to avoid a posterior bub by using Optimal fetal positioning. She spent so much time on her hands and knees during the last month of pregnancy. she still ended up with a really really long labour because bubs just stayed posterior. Like you, she was so active during her labour, but bubs still could't turn.

    By doing what you did, you can increase your chances of having a beautiful birth. But nothing you can do can guarantee you that tyype of birth experience.

    I had a wonderful first birth. This time around, there is a chance I have Placenta Praevia and will need a c/s (will find out for sure next week). Although I will be disappointed if that really is the case, there is nothing I could have done to prevent this. I have the right mindset, i am educated, i have a great support team, but if my body just doesn't play along, there is nothing I can do about it.

    How were your subsequent births?

    All the best, Sasa

  2. #146
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    Newcastle indefinitely
    554

    Dear Blackduckies,

    First of all, thanks for sharing - it sounds like you need to talk about your experience and if I was you I would feel the same - cheated/what happened/could I have done something differently?

    I don't have a medical background so I can't comment from that perspective but
    From what I have read posterior births are more difficult. I'm sure you know that though

    I think too for first time labours nothing can quite prepare us for the reality of it and what our expectations can be. It sounds like from your story that your expectations were completely different from your reality. I imagine that is going to take a lot of sorting out emotionally for you and take some time.

    This is your story, your experience and I hope you can be at peace with it at some stage - you have taken the unexpected path, one that was more difficult and painful than you expected emotionally and physically.

    Healing from lifes experiences can be hard and painful, I have experiences too that I grapple to understand - 'why me'? This isn't what I wanted! Things that people can't really understand unless they walk in your shoes.

    So, although I didn't have your experiences of labour, bf and beyond, I am more than able to at least listen and hear you.



    Mich xx

  3. #147
    BellyBelly Market Place Member

    Jul 2007
    Margaret River
    492

    Hi blackduckies

    please do not feel that you may have offended anyone, every experience is valid and important

    from a my midwifery point of view (if I may) a posterior labor and birthing can often be more difficult simply due to the greater degree of rotation through the pelvis that the baby needs to take in order to birth

    posterior labor is known to be more painful for many women because the uterus has to work harder to rotate the baby to an anterior position leading to an increased workload for the uterus and an increased oxygen need for the muscle (and also your baby).

    you did not do anything wrong at all

    there are 2 people involved in birthing...the mother and the baby... and sometimes no matter what the mother does the baby has other ideas on how they enter the world

    Nat

  4. #148
    Registered User

    Dec 2006
    Gippsland Vic
    1,686

    Thanks girls, it is very tough and I have to say I am very jealous of those who get that beautiful birth experience.
    Yes I do need to talk about this, I did'nt realize howmuch until I started to read and type. The rest of my births are as follows:

    I went on to have 3 late first trim MCs then I got my beautiful boy, again a posterieor baby who mangaed to break my waters butnot send me into labour, I was induced after trying lots of natural methods to get him moving, but... in the end my waters had been broken for too long and he was medically inducded, only o get into distress when mild labour started??? ending in CS..

    DD started out well, no waters breaking first labour progressed well, no crazy pain or the like until 8cms where I stayed for hours my OB came and broke my waters which were mecoinium stained, baby was showing signs of distress, he allowed me a bit longer then checked me again, still no progress!!! He was hopefully of reaching her but not close enough, so after 15 hours of labour I had another CS, she was a big bub and had a groove around her head where she had tilted to prevent coming any further she weighed 9pound 10 ounces.

    Another 3MC's

    Last DD bubs no4, I went VBAC2 very excited to get the chance to try again, knew that the reality was slim, but still wanted to try, I knew I had to progress well and fairly quickly was'nt going to take any chances, she was'nt overly big according to US, my scar loooked good through the layers as well as externally. It all started well, waters broke but labour started, I had to go to hospital about 3 hours after contractions started, I was checked to make sure my waters where broken and I was 3cm dilated, contractions were regular and strong every couple of mins for about 30 seconds. I was so hopefull that this was the one.. baby was happy!!! contractions got stronger more often and longer and in my back again lots of blood and waters gushing the midwife was convincedt hat a baby was'nt far off?? I started to feel wimpy and asked for gas, which did'nt do much, I had the feeling I needed to push, but also knew it was'nt time, just pressure in my bottom I guess from her postion? After being there for a few hours I asked for another internal, I needed to know that I was going well, my doc had told me 6-8 hours to reduced the risk of uterine rupture?? I measured 3 cms......??????? I lost it, I was scared for my baby, I knew nothing was going to change.. I could'nt believe that I could be in labour so strongly and still be there(3cms), this was about 1am in th e morning, i begged fro the CS thats when the talk started about waiting till the morning and seeing how things were, exactly what my doc told me to avoid, I became really afraid, I know the risk of rupture is slim, they have to tell you everything when weighing up to go VBAC especially second time around, but... I did'nt want to be the slim chance... midwife went and rang doc on duty, I told her to tell him I was booked for a CS, (JIC I went overdue, plus I got my OB whom I trusted) and I wanted to have it. She came back and said, he would come. Another internal was done 8cms was the verdict, OMG was all I could think can I keep trying, yes but not for long theatr was being set up everyone was coming in... great just my luck.. would he just help me I asked, I doubt it when everything is ready to go bubs would have to be coming out???

    When he got there is was in thertre waitng, I had already had the epidural done, I asked him if he could help me delivery VB, he did the internal a few quiet words were said then he came and told DH that a mistake ahd been made and I was only 3cms still???? CS was performed, by that stage I was relieved to have my baby girl in my arms fit an d healthy, later the midwife apologized and said it was hard to tell as my cervix had become loose and flopppy??? I don't know...???they do 1000 births a year and a lot of the staff are part time, it seems like a pretty big mistake though. But having said that I think the chances CS after CS and even more so after 2 of them, are greatly increased for lots of reasons, I think you need to be in a big hospital , need experinced staff, need a doula or private midwife and ttrust in your body that you can do it (easier said than done)even then I think it is a tall order. Given there is a time limit etc.
    I'm just glad I did'nt have to do this 50-100 years ago without help and CS I think I would have given birth to dead of seriously injured babies and and maybe even died myslef..
    Well I guess at the end of it all I got a naturalouchie drug free VB and i got to labour for 3 subsequent births and came close!!! But I still can't help feeling a bit ripped off until I look at my beautiful babies, then it does'nt really matter how they got here.

  5. #149
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    Middle Victoria
    8,924

    just bumping up

  6. #150
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jan 2006
    11,633

    Not planning on labour any time soon, but I always loved this thread

  7. #151
    Registered User

    Jun 2005
    USA
    3,991

    Good call. I'd say this was one of the best and most important threads I've read on this forum.

  8. #152
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    6,900

    Me too, great thread! What happened to blue daisy?

  9. #153
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jan 2006
    11,633

    I'm pretty sure she's still around in the birthing business, just not on BB

    ... and sometimes no matter what the mother does the baby has other ideas on how they enter the world
    This is so true for my DD

  10. #154
    Registered User

    Jul 2010
    Rural NSW near ACT
    413

    Love this post. I have read twice and will be using in a birth plan some of these ideas. Thanks

  11. #155
    Registered User

    Dec 2008
    1,431

    I found her website. Google 'Belly Flower'

  12. #156
    Registered User

    Jan 2010
    In Love land with my family :D
    1,512

    I love this thread! Its an awesome read!

  13. #157
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jan 2006
    11,633

    Hey, look, now we can 'like' it on facebook

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