Oliver's arrival

**Roryrory** · December 3rd, 2007, 01:51 PM

Wednesday morning. Tired. Clock says 3.59am. Flynn should be awake soon. Ooh that hurts. Ahh, there he goes, Flynn is stirring.

Hang on, come to think of it - I have woken up twice already with this pain. It isn't like the braxton hicks I've been having, which felt like a band tightening across the top of my bump, but lower down, like pressure in my groin area. Like bad period pain.

Like contractions? Last time my waters started leaking so I knew things were moving, but this is different. There's Flynn again - better go settle him.

After trying to go to the loo but just feeling pressure, I settle Flynn and jump on the net to find the Mercy Family Birth Centre's number, thinking I had better call just to get an idea on whether this is the real thing and when I should come in. I tell the midwife on duty that when Flynn was being born I left for this hospital "when it felt different" but by the time I got there I was 9cm dialted. She agrees with me that waiting that long wasn't a good idea, particularly when it was a 45 minute drive in peak hour traffic, which was just hours away. We agree that I will call her just as we are leaving, which might be in a few hours or so.

I spend the next half hour checking that everything is packed in my labour bag - my hypnobirthing and relaxation CDs, water bottle, video and still camera, basic overnight gear. I contemplate taking baby name books for Mick to read during the labour - we don't have a boy's name picked yet - but somehow I think this will be a quick one. I tell Mick what is going on and that he'll have to get up soon. Then at 5am I call my mum - she's coming over to mind Flynn - and wake Mick. He is in a daze - he has forgotten our last conversation, and quickly realises that the baby is actually on his or her way. Poor Flynnie keeps stirring - he is teething - so I give him a dose of panadol. Hopefully he will be able to sleep long enough not to be cranky when he wakes.

Mum arrives around 5.30am and as she does the contractions start to feel a little stronger, and by the time we are ready to go I have to stop everything and focus on relaxing. I mentally note that Mick and I were right not to have her around while I was having Flynn - she is getting terribly stressed by seeing me in pain and has no idea that you shouldn't try to have a conversation with a woman in the middle of a contraction. I call the Mercy and let them know we are on our way, and mum says that at least when I get to the hospital they can give me something for the pain. I tell her I won't be having any drugs, and she says I am braver than she was. I smile and tell her not to worry and that everything will be ok, but as I am in the middle of saying it I am hit by another contraction. Poor mum!!

The ride to the hospital is nice and quick and despite a few painful bumps in the road during contractions we get there without too much drama at 6.30am. I have to stop outside the main entrance during a contraction and while we wait to be buzzed into the Birth Centre. Once inside I lie on the bed and straight away the midwife in charge says "You can lie on the floor - you only have to use the bed in a private hospital". Problem is I want the bed because it is so nice and soft, but as soon as a contaction hits I am on the floor slumped forward on a beanbag.

Ah this is nice. But maybe I came in to early? As I listen to the midwife explain what we can do and how things are likely to progress, I realise I haven't had a contraction for a while. Is this a false alarm, I ask? No, says the midwife, you just need to feel comfortable and nest for a while, you need to feel safe and relaxed. Just sit there and let things happen.

Things do start happening - more contractions. Not a false alarm at all. It is so much better being able to move as I like. After about half an hour the new midwife arrives - I think her name was Monique. She reads our birth plan which pretty well says that we are very happy to be at the birth centre and trust the midwives will assist us to have the natural birth we deserve. (Monique follows the plan to the letter throughout the birth and turns out to be wonderful). I stay on the floor for what seems a long while, occasionally rocking from side to side to relieve the pressure in my pelvis. Mick keeps letting me know that the bulge I can feel in my sacrum is moving down my spine, and Monique assures me the pressure I can feel is the baby moving towards birth. The hypnobirthing training kicks in, and I consciously relax between contractions and focus on the end goal throughout the process. I don't ever achieve the fully meditative state that hypnobirthing usually brings (probably because I didn't practice the techniques often enough), but the ability to focus on relaxing and not fear each contraction helps me enormously.

This is so much better than being on my back! How could I have delivered on my back last time? And I was on my back for so long - at least four hours. I can't imagine how much it would have hurt. My baby is moving down the birth canal and my joints are opening out to help him or her along. Mick is mopping my face wish a washer right on cue after each contraction - my upper body is so hot! "Relaxing and opening, relaxing and opening" repeats Mick. My baby is moving down the birth canal and each contraction helps us reach our destination of birth.

Unfortunately I can't kneel properly on my left knee due to a childhood injury and strain of not being able to rest onto my heels together with the increasing cold in the lower half of my body makes me call for the bath, which is promptly filled for me to a nice warm level. Between contractions I hobble across the hall to the bath and the warm water is a welcome relief. As the Mercy doesn't permit water births it is only as deep as my upper waist when I sit in it, but it is lovely to float in it between contractions to bring some relief to the ache in my pelvic joints. During contractions I roll to my side, but after a short while they take on an altogether different, more urgent nature and I realise that I am going to have to push my baby out soon. I can't do it lying on my side so I leave the bath and return to the room, this time opting for kneeling on the bed while slumped forward onto the beanbag.

Oh the pressure is so strong now! Is it pain? It is "painful" but I somehow can't describe it as pain. It comes in waves and I ask Mick for the relaxation CDs to be put on. Instantly I ask for them to be stopped - I don't want anything outside my body right now! It is all inside - the waves, the pressure, my baby, my life. Aurora, I hear the midwife say, you are breathing really well but you are going to have to start pushing soon or we'll never have this baby. Oh, so we are that close? I hear her put on a pair of gloves just as another surge of pressure comes over me, and I promise I will push with the next one. Ahhhhhhh! That hurt, I yell! Relaxing and opening, says Mick, you and the baby are working together so well. Ahhhhhhhh!!!

I am pushing now. I find I have no fear of tearing - the midwife has told me that more and slower burning means stretching therefore less tearing. She tells me the head is in sight. Strangely, I am able to do this on two levels - one the primal animalistic one I am completely in the zone with my baby and body, but I am also able to watch what is going on, and I keep having thoughts like "wow I am so much more conscious of the baby's movement down the birth canal this time", and "gee, your waters really do make a popping sound when they break", just as one particularly strong push leads to a gush of warmth and comfort.

The next push brings on an incredible burning, and I realise the baby's head must be crowning. But then it stops, and I hear a faint cry. "That is your baby, Aurora", says the midwife. Amazed, I realise my baby's head is half out, that he or she is between worlds at the moment. Another surge of pressure leads to a series of long and slow pushes and after the emergence of the shoulders (boy, I have no memory of that last time!!) my body disappears and all I am aware of is the sound of my baby crying and the feeling of the beanbag against my face.

"We are short of a name", says Mick with a smile. We have a little boy!

Somehow I turn over and my little baby boy, screaming loudly, is passed to me. Almost immediately he stops crying and starts looking around. It is all a blur, but the only thing that is clear is the feeling of complete peace and calm. It is not like last time - there isn't that incredible and giddy feeling of elation. Instead there is a sense of overwhelming love and serenity as I hold my boy. My little nameless boy.

So that's it - the story of how Oliver arrived. As for the technical stuff - after a natural third stage and shower, I feed my little boy and he weighs in at 3.89 kilos - just 10 grams less than Flynn. I am told I have two small grazes, neither of which are worth stitching, and that all is well with both of us. The first stage was 3 hours 23 minutes, second stage 27 minutes and third was 25 minutes.

And as for how I feel now, five days later, with my two little boys? Wonder full. Literally, full of wonder.

**BellyBelly** · December 3rd, 2007, 01:58 PM

OooOOh what a BEAUTIFUL story!!!! Love it. Thank-you for sharing Aurora.... so different isn't it

**katnap** · December 3rd, 2007, 02:31 PM

thanksfor sharing your wonderful birth story aurora, i lvoe the names of your boys

and what a mop of hair oliver has!!

enjoy your baby moon ;-)

**Olive** · December 3rd, 2007, 02:49 PM

well done aurora!! sounds like the perfect birth

**New Dawn** · December 3rd, 2007, 03:13 PM

what a wonderful story made me cry bringing back wonderful memories

enjoy both your beautiful boys

**Tinsel** · December 3rd, 2007, 03:16 PM

Rory, that is such a wonderful story. You write so well and what a lovely DH. I hope mine is as sweet as yours when the time comes.

**Zee** · December 3rd, 2007, 03:29 PM

What a wonderfull birth! He looks very cute aswell!

**aussienic** · December 3rd, 2007, 03:35 PM

what a wonderful birth!!

**PlonkeeMumma** · December 3rd, 2007, 03:52 PM

Congratulations Rory - sounds like exactly the birth you wanted - yay! And great choice of names - Oliver was our first choice but a cousin nabbed it first so we couldn't! Enjoy your babymoon with your wonderful boys.

Julie x

**rufalina** · December 3rd, 2007, 05:33 PM

What a great story. So well told. Thank you for sharing all that.

**jaspen** · December 3rd, 2007, 05:42 PM

congratulations rory - it sounds amazing and special for you - well done

paradise lost · December 3rd, 2007, 06:28 PM

Beautiful story Rory. COngratulations on your new addition and on birthing him with usch grace.

Bx

**BekZ** · December 4th, 2007, 05:57 AM

What a beautiful story. Your account has stired so many emotions in me.

**suse** · December 4th, 2007, 06:12 AM

Aurora, that is such a wonderful birth and you have told the story so beautifully. I'm in tears as I look over at my new little man, who was born on the same day!!! What time was Oliver born?

Thank you so much for sharing with us!