Gen Y Embarrased to Breastfeed

[spenceee]

I have been trawling the news today (not much else to do when away from town on business)

The simple summary of this one is that Gen Y is less likely to Breastfeed due to embarrassment.

Gen-Ys 'embarrassed to breastfeed in public' | News.com.au

THE mums and dads of the future don't fully grasp the benefits of breastfeeding and are unlikely to do it in public because it's embarrassing, a study suggests.....

.....More than 50 per cent of women believed it would be uncomfortable to breastfeed in public, and a majority of men and women did not want their child to be breastfed in public for fear of embarrassment.

And 75 per cent of respondents said it was unlikely their child would be exclusively breastfed for the first six months of life as recommended by the World Health Organisation......

....Prof Russell-Bennett said the study showed both young men and women did not understand the benefits of breastfeeding and perceived bottle feeding as convenient and easier.

Most did not know the answers to basic questions such as what age should infants be introduced to foods and fluids other than breast milk or formula, and does breastfeeding prevent allergies and infections in infants.

The answers are six months, and yes.

As an expectant Gen Y Dad, I am concerned by this, I have no problems with people who make a choice not to breastfeed but I have a problem if someone wants to but feels that they shouldn't.

(FWIW Jellymaker hopes to breastfeed for as much of the first year as she can)

I am somewhat ashamed to admit that it is only in the past year did I begin to see breasts as anything other than a female sexual attribute (Ignorance not attitude). I am certain that I was not alone in this line of thought and I even think that many of my male friends not yet in the "Baby Zone" will probably still think this way.

I can empathise with young mums feeling ogled and I don't want anyone ogling my wife either. I was wondering if some mum's here may have some helpful suggestions on how to breastfeed publicly but in a discreet way?

[Lulu]

I'm happy to say that my oldest daughter won't be fazed a bit!

Breastfeeding tops are great, although I never used one I had a wrap or pashmina that did the trick well.

[Ella]

Yep I used a little light weight blanket in winter and during summer a dark coloured muslin wrap folded in half. This stopped people actually seeing anything but I'm afraid there will always be some horribly rude men... and women who will gawk.

To deal with gawking a very good friend of mine used to look the gawker in the eye and say quite loudly "I'm lactating you sicko!" Seemed to work well for her! bahahaha

[Indadhanu]

I'm Gen Y I think (born in 1986), and no shame or embarrassment here, although my mum did breastfeed my youngest brother until he was about 3 (he was born when I was 14, so they weaned when I was 17, maybe almost 18?), so it was normal for me. Although she doesn't agree with public breastfeeding (hmm, that makes it sound like a spectator event doesn't it...) so I just pushed through that on my own.
I actually had (still have...) more issues with relatives (on Shel's side, who, funnily enough, never breastfed) than strangers: questioning from 8 weeks if it was appropriate to keep breastfeeding, and question my motives for continuing I never felt 'ogled' but then I knew I wasn't flashing my boobs around and for someone to see something they really had to get right up in my face and have a good old look.

Easy ways to breastfeed in public. I had a sling which made it wasy on my arms, and discreet if I wanted to (I had a Bear Hug Baby ring sling with a long tail that I could pull up over my shoulder if I felt I needed to although the sling itself covered enough that I never needed to do that). If she feels self-conscious, just reassure her that no on e can actually see anything, in fact you can't even tell that she is breastfeeding! Not that she should be ashamed, but it's hard at first to put yourself in a potentially exposing/vulnerable position.

[Indadhanu]

I would be more embarrassed feeding my child formula...

Once I took EBM with me, and I ended up telling many people it WAS in fact EBM and not ABM, because I was so embarrassed that people mught be thinking I'm giving formula and not breastfeeding! Turns out most people really didn't care though

[sunshine_sieben]

I have heard those stats before and they make me really sad.
But, to be honest, before having kids, i had no idea what age solids should be introduced, either.
I don't think any man thinks of breasts as anything else than the contents of their sexual fantasies. Well, unless he has a close family member (mother, sister, wife, daughter) who is currently BFing.
Regarding the question about BFing discreetly in public, if your wife can make it work, feeding in a carrier or a wrap like the Hug-A-Bub can be very discreet. A BFing wardrobe also makes a difference. Or alternatively a shawl or something like that can do the trick.
I personally never bothered to cover up. Firstly, because in the beginning it didn't come to me so easily, so I needed to see what was going on. Secondly, my kids didn't like being covered up, thirdly, cause I couldn't be bothered and last but not least, I don't think I need to cover up. I actually make a point of making it look like thee most normal thing in the world. I WANT people to see what I am doing. I WANT it to be a common sight. I DO NOT WANT to hide away or make it look like it is shameful. Of course I don't wave my boobs into people's faces. When I feed my baby's head and body covers up almost everything. So there really isns't much to see.

Oh, for older babbies, BFing necklaces can be great as they keep bub focused and stop them from "flirting" with every person walking past.

I find it really puzzling that this generation is so happy to go out clubbing wearing very daring outfits, go to the beach in skimpy Bikinis, etc. But breastfeeding is embarrassing??? How does that make any sense?
I always tell myself: Most people who are walking by have seen boobs before. What's the big deal?

For what it's worth, people don't stare. I've never run into that scenario. Some people seem to look away and are a little embarrassed. but I figure, that's their problem, not mine. But you have no idea how many people come up to you and make positive comments. Often older ladies who say how wonderful it is to see women BF their babies. Or recall how special their own BFing relationships were with their own children.

[Shades]

Spencee - I found 'discreet' breastfeeding (using a muslin to cover up etc) really hard because my son kept losing his mouthful and then I'd have to lift the cloth to help him back on, or sit there with it over my head as well - which made me feel WAY more embarrassed and self-conscious than sitting there confidently with him latched on and no muslin...
I made a point of just pushing past the embarrassment right from the first feeds in hospital with visitors present so it was easier to do it in public later on. Once you're used to it there's really not that much breast showing and sometimes you can barely even tell... let alone ogle.

[msadelaide]

I had no issue getting my boobs out anywhere and everywhere in the 3 years I BFed DD people would look especially when she was older, usually in disgust.

I think its very sad that people choose not to breastfeed because they are embarrassed. I would be more embarrassed feeding my child formula...

[Rainbow_Mumma]

wow only 7 weeks until the Jellyman is here!!

Im Gen Y and for the short time my girls BF i did it in public i dont give a **** what people say after all my baby is just doing what is natural (eating)
I have known a few people though to say they didnt bf because they were afraid to do it in public but some of these do also come from gen x not just gen y

[sloane]

it's funny - i don't like to BF in public (for eg in a shopping centre food court), but that never occurred to me to be a reason not to BF. it doesn't stop us getting out & about - i'll feed in the car or in a parent's room instead. my DS still feeds pretty much 2-3 hourly during the day as well so if i do want to go somewhere, i know i'll probably have to feed him.

ETA - i'm gen x & i don't have any problem with people BFing in public in general, i love seeing it. i'm just not comfy with it. sorry, just wanted to add that!

[Jahzara]

I would be more embarrassed feeding my child formula...

Can you tell me what you mean by that ?

I have formula fed 3 children and not been at all embarassed and i have nothing against breast feeding at all...

[Rainbow_Mumma]

:yeahthat: (refering to Jahzaras comment) i was wondering too as after 8 weeks i ended up having no choice but to formula feed my 2 girls

[Doing my best]

:yeahthat: (refering to Jahzaras comment) i was wondering too as after 8 weeks i ended up having no choice but to formula feed my 2 girls

I didn't read it as msadelaide saying that that those who FF should be embarrassed, but more as her feeling embarrassed if she had to change her normal feeding method while in public rather than growing to feel comfortable BF in public..

I remember going out with my mum when DD was about 3 weeks old as I felt that an old guy sitting across from me was oggling me, I ended up giving her FF. I didn't have enough to soley BF, but I switched to FF a lot quicker that day..

[Miss E]

Interesting article, but I can't help but think the lack of knowledge has more to do with the probability that most of the respondents wouldn't have had children yet or even be planning to do so in the near future. I'm a gen x'er and I have to say that I really didn't have any idea about those issues until after I got pregnant. Yes I knew that breastfeeding was meant to be better for your baby, but I didn't know why or how much better. In fact I didn't know about when you introduced solids or that you should continue breastfeeding till 12 months until after I had my bub!

TBH I'm not entirely comfortable breastfeeding in public. I have done it once or twice when I've had no other choice, but usually I will use the parents room or plan ahead and have a bottle of EBM with me. It's not really about people looking at me or anything like that, I guess I'm just a bit of a prude and don't feel comfortable. But I never saw that as a reason not to breastfeed till 12 months, it's easy to work around and really isn't an issue.

[clairekerzner]

I read that article today, too- it got me so annoyed I even posted a reply, though I don't think it got published :P

My problem with the article was twofold.

1. This news service is constantly publishing articles slamming "Gen Y" for their poor decisions/ lack of responsibility/ etc etc etc. They tar everyone in this generation with the same brush, when there's absolutely no way we're all making the same decisions or behaving the same way. I just get so irritated to see my generation matter-of-factly referred to as lazy/ fickle/ irresponsible when I know that *I* and most of the people I know couldn't be further from that. The survey itself certainly had some interesting results, not least showing the need for greater breastfeeding awareness, but any valid message was buried under the usual Gen Y bashing.

2. The people surveyed, by the wording of the questions/ answers obviously don't have kids yet, and in the article title they're called "future" mums. They're saying they "don't think" they'll breastfeed to six months, or that they "believed it would be" embarrassing to breastfeed in public. I'd love to hear from those same people once they've gone through the whole process of antenatal care and giving birth!

I wasn't sure I'd be comfortable breastfeeding in public, either, before my DD arrived in 2008 (when I was 27). But it certainly wasn't going to stop me from doing it. I also thought I would only breastfeed for six months- having no experience at all with babies, I had a weird idea that kids went straight from boob to all solids as soon as their first teeth popped through <g>. I know, I know. Lol.

Anyway! My daughter spent a month in the NICU, and I had every doctor, nurse and midwife in three hospitals, plus every family member and all my friends, watching me attempt to breastfeed her for the first four weeks. After that kind of start, plus two rounds of ultrasound treatment for mastitis, my perspective on breastfeeding was completely altered. At 14 months of age my DD is still breastfed anywhere, anytime. I don't cover up, and if anyone else feels uncomfortable about it I believe it's up to them to look the other way (or get an education!).

As to the six months, by the time I got there, I was nowhere near ready to give up the wonderful breastfeeding relationship we had, and I'm still not quite.

So, I really don't think there's any relevance in the study, since none of those surveyed actually know what it's like to hold a little bundle in their arms and feed them. Yet.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

As someone on the gen X/Y border, I would BF anywhere. People didn't ogle: having a baby on there is a bit of a turn-off! Plus I had tops that you didn't have to lift and expose all my flabby tummy: that helped too! It looked like we were just having a cuddle.

I find it's the older women who go to bottles before 6m. The younger ones can be scarily - militantly - passionate about it.

[{sarah}]

My question is what is Gen Y??

I just googled it & got:
1) 1981 or later
2) 1977 - 1997
3) 1976 - 1985
4) 1980 - 1990

This article is referring to 18-29 year olds, so 1980-1992, I wonder if another article on Gen Y using a different definition would get a different result? Just thinking out loud...

[Cupcake]

Would be interesting to see the people they surveyed...

I dont have a problem with it and fully plan on giving it a go!