I found, that once you tell one of these people, quite without apology, to take their opinion and shove it up their ... , then the comments generally stop pretty quickly.
I have zero patience for this kind of crap, and TBH, I never understood why people pull out the "Oh, I am still BF because I don't want to wash bottles" or "It's cheaper" lines, when what they really want to say, "You know what? **** off, because you are clearly an ignorant fool"... So I pretty much say what I think - I don't do the passive, apologetic, meek stuff. DD2 is now almost 3, still breastfeeding, and the only people who ever comment now are those who don't know me well enough not to.
Congratulations on making it as far as you have, it is a great achievement! Hope you can continue as long as you wish to.
Firstly wow,congrats on 9 months, great job you two xx ( I just love your dd's rosy red cheeks)
Secondly, sorry you have that sort of pressure, my best friend ended up weaning cos of the negative comments ( her son was 3 tho) but it's still unfair. So many ignorant people.
People who know me don't bother saying anything cos they know my ahem, strong views on the subject, but if I did get any comments, I would be pulling out the WHO recommendations. Other than that, I would just smile and say something stupid like " yeah, I'm forcing her to do it, she actually hates it"
Hopefully Like a pp said you are a groundbreaker, normalising bf for people who aren't used to seeing it.
Keep going, if you need reinforcement that you are doing the right thing, come on BB or join pinky mckays Facebook page and get some inspiration xx
You and any number of other mummas who breastfeed and continue to feed past a perceived ok age are changing the world one breastfeed at a time - hopefully the fact that you have continued to feed past your initial goal and have set another will mean that if/when they next see a child feeding past these ages they will be more accepting and if/when they have their own children they will breastfeed and feed past their goals.
With DD I initially set out for 6 months, then it was 12 months then it was that we would breastfeed until it no longer worked for us - we ended up feeding until she was 3 years old and we often talk about when she had mumma milk. My sister had her first child when my DD was 14 months old - she breastfed her DD and said on occasion it was my feeding DD that inspired her to continue. She fed her DD past 12 months and fed her into a second pregnancy, her DD was about 18 or so months when she weaned because of the change of milk due to the pregnancy hormones. Her second DD is almost 12 months old and my sister is aiming for 3 years.
Our other sister FF her first after trying to BF but with her second (born at same time of other sisters first DD) she was inspired to express and fed him EBM for 6 months when she then switched to FF. It was great to see her have a change all because breastfeeding and breastmilk had become a bit more familiar to her.
So you can change the world - one breastfeed at a time.
I found, that once you tell one of these people, quite without apology, to take their opinion and shove it up their ... , then the comments generally stop pretty quickly.
I have zero patience for this kind of crap, and TBH, I never understood why people pull out the "Oh, I am still BF because I don't want to wash bottles" or "It's cheaper" lines, when what they really want to say, "You know what? **** off, because you are clearly an ignorant fool"... So I pretty much say what I think - I don't do the passive, apologetic, meek stuff. DD2 is now almost 3, still breastfeeding, and the only people who ever comment now are those who don't know me well enough not to.
Congratulations on making it as far as you have, it is a great achievement! Hope you can continue as long as you wish to.
Now I say exactly what I think. I went viral for my thoughts on breastfeeding so people are well aware my opinion. But when I had my first, I was freshly 21, I didn't know I'd still be feeding at 12months let alone 3yrs or through a pregnancy or tandem feeding, all my friends and cousins were similar ages, uni students with as little clue as me and I wasn't confident or sure of myself so it was just easier to frame it in ways they would instantly get and move on. And it was all true, I loved breastfeeding for the convenience, being able to lay down mid afternoon with a baby is brilliant, settling any place, always with me at the perfect temp, those are things that I appreciated about breastfeeding before I learnt more and still do.
It might seem a disservice short term but it helped me through a difficult time when I was figuring things out to have ways that shut down an argument I wasn't prepared for. And it allowed me to grow into my opinions and now be able to stand up loud and proud.
A lot of people are fighting an uphill battle with themself too, I knew intellectually I was doing the right thing for us but I never saw breastfeeding, nobody in my family did it, my friends were all prechildren aged, pop culture isn't much help so I felt self conscious and weird and standing alone. And as a new, young, unplanned parent (trifecta of targetability for helpful advice) there was no way I was ready to fight that tide alone. Some people would have been, that's great but not me, I was definitely a meek passive person in many ways.
So I get it if people aren't ready to just tell people to **** off. All start somewhere.
One of my friends just bought a bib for DD that says "I'm a boob baby"
I think I'm going to take a pic and stick it up on fb
Subtle and maybe effective? Then I'll go a bit more assertive if need be!
I tend to go WHO recommends at least 2 years I also bought a shirt size 0/1/2 (can't remember exact size) from cotton on which says mmmm boobies which DH didn't like me putting on DS1 ;rolleyes: which I thought got the message across
just popping in to say you're not alone, joeve... yesterday i got - 'if you're still breasfeeding by 10-12 mths it will be more about you rather than him (my son)'. that was from my mum.
my goal was 3 mths, and now my little guy is 4 mths i am aiming for 6 mths. then 9 mths...
I can promise you that bfing a toddler, esp while pg, is def not about me! I keep going because the immunity benefits are tried and true in our family but oh the days I wish it wasn't so!
There are lots of very good reasons to keep bfing and so far only one to stop before you want to - it might make other ppl uncomfortable (who try to put that back on you). And I don't think that's a very good reason to stop at all.
Short term goals are the way to go, Andie. And you should reward yourself when you reach each one.
For me, breastfeeding a toddler is kind of about me - it's the single most unique thing that I have with my child and enhances our bond of love & trust in a way that I can't really begin to define, it just is. So I treasure it fiercely. BUT - I'm only continuing to feed because it's something that he is still wanting, so in that regard, it's all about him, it's just that I get some benefits as well. ITMS. I'm certainly not out there insisting that he has a breastfeed.
With my first baby, my goal was to reach the 12month mark, because that's what I thought was the gold standard. But when he turned 12 months old, he didn't magically become this super mature being that no longer needed feeding, it was way more gradual than that for us. And I did it to his schedule, not to anyone else's. My second "baby" is still going at 3.5yrs. But following their individual leads around feeding is one of the best decisions I have made in this whole parenting game. And even when my babies did learn to walk, we don't actually feed whilst walking - we cuddle, either sitting or lying down in bed, so really they still look like a baby being held ;-).
I'm lucky in a sense no one was brave enough to say any of these things to me my sister might have made a snarky comment but I ignore her most days lol I failed my son by giving up after a week but I was determined to bf jazzy so I did she ha some formula from about 6 months but that was while I was at work one day a week and occasionally a sat night when my mum watched them coz I was hopeless at expressing but we made it to 19 months before we stopped only happened coz I got a job that was every day then I went to night shift so I just wasn't there to give her booby but I'm proud of myself and u should be too 9 months is excellent and if I happen to go and have another baby I will be aiming for longer again because it's for their benefit and I believe it stopped her from contracting whooping cough and chicken pox
Be proud and continue on we will be here to support u if other ppl don't
ooops... anyway, had parents over last night. got the 'how often you breastfeeding' questions again. apparently bc I'm still feeding him up to 6 times a day it's 'more for you now though, isn't it?'. huh?! I'm sure I have already had this conversation... had to explain that he still needed milk for nutrition & that if I stopped I'd have to out & but formula bc he can't just have nothing! 'oh, but he seems to really enjoy his food?' they said. seriously. I give up trying to explain it to them anymore.
my little guy is 8.5 months now... not long until my 9 mth goal. next stop - 12 months. : )
yeah, my little one has started to try & get his big toe in there while feeding... it's quite funny really. and he likes to high-five me continuously while he's feeding, like clapping hands. and he likes to slap his hand against his knee. funny little guy. ; )
saffy - I know, it's silly the comments they make about it. they are so proud of the job I'm doing with him & tell me all the time what a lovely mother they think I am. doesn't make sense. :-/
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