Gen Y Embarrased to Breastfeed

[spenceee]

I have been trawling the news today (not much else to do when away from town on business)

The simple summary of this one is that Gen Y is less likely to Breastfeed due to embarrassment.

Gen-Ys 'embarrassed to breastfeed in public' | News.com.au

THE mums and dads of the future don't fully grasp the benefits of breastfeeding and are unlikely to do it in public because it's embarrassing, a study suggests.....

.....More than 50 per cent of women believed it would be uncomfortable to breastfeed in public, and a majority of men and women did not want their child to be breastfed in public for fear of embarrassment.

And 75 per cent of respondents said it was unlikely their child would be exclusively breastfed for the first six months of life as recommended by the World Health Organisation......

....Prof Russell-Bennett said the study showed both young men and women did not understand the benefits of breastfeeding and perceived bottle feeding as convenient and easier.

Most did not know the answers to basic questions such as what age should infants be introduced to foods and fluids other than breast milk or formula, and does breastfeeding prevent allergies and infections in infants.

The answers are six months, and yes.

As an expectant Gen Y Dad, I am concerned by this, I have no problems with people who make a choice not to breastfeed but I have a problem if someone wants to but feels that they shouldn't.

(FWIW Jellymaker hopes to breastfeed for as much of the first year as she can)

I am somewhat ashamed to admit that it is only in the past year did I begin to see breasts as anything other than a female sexual attribute (Ignorance not attitude). I am certain that I was not alone in this line of thought and I even think that many of my male friends not yet in the "Baby Zone" will probably still think this way.

I can empathise with young mums feeling ogled and I don't want anyone ogling my wife either. I was wondering if some mum's here may have some helpful suggestions on how to breastfeed publicly but in a discreet way?

[Lulu]

I'm happy to say that my oldest daughter won't be fazed a bit!

Breastfeeding tops are great, although I never used one I had a wrap or pashmina that did the trick well.

[msadelaide]

I had no issue getting my boobs out anywhere and everywhere in the 3 years I BFed DD people would look especially when she was older, usually in disgust.

I think its very sad that people choose not to breastfeed because they are embarrassed. I would be more embarrassed feeding my child formula...

[Ella]

Yep I used a little light weight blanket in winter and during summer a dark coloured muslin wrap folded in half. This stopped people actually seeing anything but I'm afraid there will always be some horribly rude men... and women who will gawk.

To deal with gawking a very good friend of mine used to look the gawker in the eye and say quite loudly "I'm lactating you sicko!" Seemed to work well for her! bahahaha

[BrightSparkles]

I can empathise with young mums feeling ogled and I don't want anyone ogling my wife either. I was wondering if some mum's here may have some helpful suggestions on how to breastfeed publicly but in a discreet way?

you can get breastfeeding tops that are pretty discret. I had a muslin wrap over DD more so because DD kept wanting to look around and socalise rather than feed but it worked

I'm happy to get my boobies out anywhere that bubba wants to be fed. No shame here. If people wanna look then i'll show off how i'm helping my bubba.

[Rainbow_Mumma]

wow only 7 weeks until the Jellyman is here!!

Im Gen Y and for the short time my girls BF i did it in public i dont give a **** what people say after all my baby is just doing what is natural (eating)
I have known a few people though to say they didnt bf because they were afraid to do it in public but some of these do also come from gen x not just gen y

[sloane]

it's funny - i don't like to BF in public (for eg in a shopping centre food court), but that never occurred to me to be a reason not to BF. it doesn't stop us getting out & about - i'll feed in the car or in a parent's room instead. my DS still feeds pretty much 2-3 hourly during the day as well so if i do want to go somewhere, i know i'll probably have to feed him.

ETA - i'm gen x & i don't have any problem with people BFing in public in general, i love seeing it. i'm just not comfy with it. sorry, just wanted to add that!

[Indadhanu]

I'm Gen Y I think (born in 1986), and no shame or embarrassment here, although my mum did breastfeed my youngest brother until he was about 3 (he was born when I was 14, so they weaned when I was 17, maybe almost 18?), so it was normal for me. Although she doesn't agree with public breastfeeding (hmm, that makes it sound like a spectator event doesn't it...) so I just pushed through that on my own.
I actually had (still have...) more issues with relatives (on Shel's side, who, funnily enough, never breastfed) than strangers: questioning from 8 weeks if it was appropriate to keep breastfeeding, and question my motives for continuing I never felt 'ogled' but then I knew I wasn't flashing my boobs around and for someone to see something they really had to get right up in my face and have a good old look.

Easy ways to breastfeed in public. I had a sling which made it wasy on my arms, and discreet if I wanted to (I had a Bear Hug Baby ring sling with a long tail that I could pull up over my shoulder if I felt I needed to although the sling itself covered enough that I never needed to do that). If she feels self-conscious, just reassure her that no on e can actually see anything, in fact you can't even tell that she is breastfeeding! Not that she should be ashamed, but it's hard at first to put yourself in a potentially exposing/vulnerable position.

[Indadhanu]

I would be more embarrassed feeding my child formula...

Once I took EBM with me, and I ended up telling many people it WAS in fact EBM and not ABM, because I was so embarrassed that people mught be thinking I'm giving formula and not breastfeeding! Turns out most people really didn't care though

[Ryatha]

I used to try hiding DD2 when she was little, I was pretty uncoordinated then. but now she is such a sticky beak that if I try to cover her she pulls the cover off and gives me a silly look! But now if anyone looks at me I just stare back at them. I feed all the time at cafes and shopping centres when she needs to feed, no-one has said anything to me so far and I don't feel worried anymore.

I think some of that attitude is also knowing what I would say to someone if they did make a comment. So get your DW to think of things she would say if someone was to comment. There will be great suggestions on here, it is where I got most of my comebacks from

[Jahzara]

I would be more embarrassed feeding my child formula...

Can you tell me what you mean by that ?

I have formula fed 3 children and not been at all embarassed and i have nothing against breast feeding at all...

[[M]umma[M]ia]

I am somewhat ashamed to admit that it is only in the past year did I begin to see breasts as anything other than a female sexual attribute (Ignorance not attitude). I am certain that I was not alone in this line of thought and I even think that many of my male friends not yet in the "Baby Zone" will probably still think this way.

A BIG reason why i stopped BFing at 6 weeks. DF couldnt get past the idea of this either. Which is hard for me to admit, but its true.

[Rainbow_Mumma]

:yeahthat: (refering to Jahzaras comment) i was wondering too as after 8 weeks i ended up having no choice but to formula feed my 2 girls

[Indadhanu]

Jahzara & MrsS, I don't know if msadelaide feels the same so I'll answer for myself - for me, it was totally my own insecurity about people judging me about my parenting decisions. When I think about it, it's silly, because I only ever notice breastfeeding mums, and never really notice or think twice about bottlefeeding mums, so why would anyone think anything about my decisions? Part of my own insecurities at the time, and thinking that everyone noticed everything about me, and nothing to do with anyone else or their decisions.

[onthefly]

In the early days, when you're still getting the knack, you can feel a bit exposed. But honestly, when the baby's at the breast, passers by would have to be trying pretty hard to see 'anything'.

Think about what a lot of young girls wear around these days, or the models in magazines and on billboards - WAAAY more skin.

(Babies do go through pull-off-and-look-around-every-30-seconds stages, but that's another matter).

[CrazyCat]

I am gen Y.... I KNOW breastfeeding is 100% the right thing to do, I know it's natural, but I honestly feel so icky and uncomfortable thinking about doing it myself one day.
No issues seeing other people do it, i admire them...
But yeah...i'd be embarassed..at home or in public!
Guess I need to get over that.....If we ever get our baby hubby wont let me get away with not doing it...He is 100% for BF!

[Visitor7]

I think it has some to do with generations, but also a lot to do with what we're used to as a society. Take me for eg: my family were only ever breastfeeders, as were dh's family. There was no formula feeding from any of them. They're very open about it, so that's what I'm used to. When I was pg with DD1 and even after I'd had her and was learning to breastfeed, I had a wealth of experience from both families helping me, so for me it was an easy decision to not only breastfeed, but to also do it with confidence in public.
However, my BIL's DW is from a family where breastfeeding is not talked about. Most of the babies were formula fed, and that's all she knows. She does not plan on breastfeeding her baby-to-be for two reasons. She doesn't understand the benefits, and she's embarrased.
I'm Gen Y, she's Gen X.

Breastfeeding vs Formula feeding is a huge debate. Always will be. There are many people out there who look down on women who formula feed. I think that is where msadelaide is coming from. That because so many people look down on those formula feeding, she may have thought she was being looked down on.

[Doing my best]

:yeahthat: (refering to Jahzaras comment) i was wondering too as after 8 weeks i ended up having no choice but to formula feed my 2 girls

I didn't read it as msadelaide saying that that those who FF should be embarrassed, but more as her feeling embarrassed if she had to change her normal feeding method while in public rather than growing to feel comfortable BF in public..

I remember going out with my mum when DD was about 3 weeks old as I felt that an old guy sitting across from me was oggling me, I ended up giving her FF. I didn't have enough to soley BF, but I switched to FF a lot quicker that day..