Mel - your a legend hun! something that used to help with my letdown was thinking about a moment when I felt so good with my little person. Like when I met them for the first time, or got the first smile, laugh etc. capture that feeling if you can. Instead of focusing on how much I was going to get, I would think about those moments, which helped me relax and feel good inside, and before I knew it the flow was happening. that "cold" feeling you are describing sounds like let down. Well done hun.