So after a very frustrating morning where all I seemed to do was either try to BF or express or give a bottle or wash bottles, expressers and nipple shields finally topped off with an ouchy blocked duct and hot flannels and hand expressing ... we went to our MCHN appointment to find that DD has put on a WHOPPING 340g in a week and has grown 1.5cm. Now, we have not been doing too much in the way of BFing so this is not really a BFing woohoo but just a general woohoo that DD is putting on weight beautifully and I will now be much happier trying to give BFing a red hot go knowing that she has a bit of a weight buffer. Seeing the LC tomorrow.
Fi, it sounds like you're having a really rough day and you need to give yourself a break, mentally especially. You're doing a great job under difficult circumstances. Don't beat yourself up, there's no need to put so much pressure on yourself. Really, there's no way I'm going to pretend to understand how challenging it is and second guess your choices. And anyone who does is being mighty arrogant and patronising. It's not worth worrying about what 'they' would think.
Your DD is thriving and you are doing that for her, taking care of her, feeding her and being there with her when she needs you. Your DD1 is probably loving her Daddy-time (I think that'll be one of the bonuses when we have #2, DP and DD getting all of the extra time to bond).
Just remember - a decent LC has attached a few thousand babies to a few thousand boobies - she is expected to be better at it than you!
Can you hang in there expressing and bottle feeding and formula feeding (not even trying attaching very often) for a few more weeks - that gives bubs mouth a chance to grow and herself a chance to grow a bit stronger, both of which can make things easier....
Or another option is to work out what you can put up with at the moment - expressing morning, lunch and before bed for example and FF the rest of the time. And see how you go.
In case you don't know - the easier way for production line expressing is to hot soapy wash (and sterilise if you want to) the pump bits each morning and then just store them in a zip lock bag in the fridge, milky drops and all, for the day and use as needed. You don't have to wash and sterilise each time.
Last edited by Kmn; August 21st, 2010 at 08:27 PM.
It sounds like we have similar paths atm. My DS is almost 3 wks and we've been battling sucking issues (tongue tie snipped) and poor attachment, if at all. I struggled to persevere with attachment believing it was for the best but then my DS wasn't putting on weight, and with jaundice I was constantly told how important the fluids were to help flush that out. I was under enormous stress, mainly from myself, to breastfeed until my Mum said to me I should be enjoying my DS, and to be honest I wasn't because I was dreading him waking up wanting a feed. I gave myself 'permission' to change to bottle feeding but expressing and topping up the required levels with formula. Currently it's working and I'm now enjoying my DS.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you are not alone and there are people who will understand. I cannot imagine trying to do all this with a toddler. You have to do what is right for you and your family. I wish you peace with your decision -whatever that may be for you.
well i havent tried a bf for about five weeks and reconciled myself to giving up. i had a very difficult pregnancy which ive documented ad nauseum elsewhere (in brief dodgy pelvis which rendered me housebound for six months with a toddler having hourly meltdowns, gestational diabetes and trying to renovate the house, sell the house, buy a house, move house with all that going on plus my teenage step daughter deciding that would be a good time to go off the rails).
so bf issues coming after all that was just tooooooo much. i just wanted to enjoy my baby and enjoy life without my life revolving around yet another issue. i think i made the right decision at that time. i feel relaxed, calm and am enjoying being a mum.
but i'm really here for more advice. oddly, i still have traces of milk. i havent tried expressing properly bit if i give my boob a quick squueze i still have milk.
plus i just tried attaching dd and it seemed really easy compared to weeks ago. she virtually went on by herself. obviously her mouth is much bigger nowwhich makes the difference. so what would be a good plan if i want to try again bearing in mind expressing is not a great solution for me. i have big nipples which get sore expressing and with a toddler running around its just too hard to fit it in. im thinking motilium for supply instead.
I'm glad to hear that feeding today was not as sore. You will be able to get supply up, motilium will help but the best way is to offer the breast to DD regularly. The more she suckles, the more milk your body will make. I found expressing very difficult too and could never pump much milk. Your baby is the best tool for getting milk out.
In your shoes I would try offering her the breast before every feed, as well as for comfort, and switch to the bottle when she gets frustrated with the lack of milk. If you are doing this it will increase your supply without the need to express.
I would start by just offering her the breast as often as you can - including before each bottle, but also at other times. Motilium will help too, but getting both of you used to attaching and sucking is a great first step.
I would also suggest that once DD has finished her little bf and her bottle that you try and squirt out whatever you can - forget the pump, since it aint your friend, just try to empty whatever DD may have left there to send the signal to "make more please".
In a little while, if attaching is going well, you may want to consider using a supply line, so that DD gets her formula while sucking at the breast too - and hence stimulating your own supply at the same time. They can be a bit tricky to use, so once you have not-too-sore-little-bfs happening you may want to get your LC back to show you how.
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