Feeling upset from negativity towards my choice to toddler bf and tandem feed

[Ozziehoffy]

Lee, it's hard when people don't see bf an older bub (toddler) as normal I know. It seems that a lot of society see that if you bf past 6 months there is something wrong with it. I never saw myself going past 12 months but Oskar had other ideas and is still going at 18 1/2 months - however, I still see him as a baby in so many ways as well if that makes sense. I had an app at the hossy last week and the midwife (who was overall nice etc) made the comment to me that it will drain me to keep bf and being pg. TBH I don't think I'm any more tired now than I was when pg with Oskar. Good on you for commenting back!! You do what you find is best for you babies and don't you mind what others think!!!!

Jodi... what an inconsiderate comment to have made to you, what a load of hogwash!

[Snacks]

Oh man, people SUCK. Lee - you're doing brilliantly and you'll keep doing brilliantly by both your kids.
I've heard so many fascinating things about tandem feeding - our bodies are so amazing. I heard one lady made two different types of milk at the same time - one breast made newborn milk and one made toddler milk (she knew because she asked her toddler, LOL!). Your body will do you proud, Lee, so hang in there and ignore people who are threatened by your Mummy-Goddess-type qualities
And hugs to those other girls who have suffered because of the insensitive, uneducated comments of family members, friends and complete strangers alike - you are all awesome and should be proud of yourselves.

[Junglemum]

Lee- i am struggling with the same battle atm. DD is 12 months and i am 18 weeks preg. I am sick of the looks and comments about me 'still' BF'ing.

The comments like

You need to have a break from bf, because you will fade away to nothing. It will take it all out of you" (This being said while glaring at me).

drive me crazy. It seems everyone thinks they know my body and babies better than i do. They say these comments like they are concened for my health, but they are not concerned, they are just being judgemental. If they were concerned then they would be supportive not critical.

Up theirs i say. I avoid talking about it now, or change the subject. I don't want to hear their negative crap. Like you, i'll take it as it comes, and i am sure i will make the right decision for all of us. Good luck to you.

[Beach Mama]

Oh sweety Some people are so RUDE and IGNORANT...... what is it about breastfeeding that makes people think they have all the answers and can question someones choices about it.... Good on you for having a reply hun and just remember you are right and they are uneducated and ill-informed and wrong which is pretty sad really... Hang in there and good luck hun.
I already get weird looks when I say that I want to breastfeed this little man longer than I did Izzy which was 11 mths

[Jennifer13]

: to them!

Good on you for having some comments on hand to stand up for yourself. Since when did your body and your parenting become their issue? Perhaps you should be giving them advice on weight loss, toilet habits and sex?

[StrawberryMumma]

Thanks so so much guys xx Your posts were great. I am really trying not to doubt myself.

Jodie- I cannot believe people said that to you.. I'm really in shock! I have never ever heard such a load of rubbish in my life. You poor thing for having to hear that.

[Pretty Butterfly]

There is so much misconception about b/feeding, I hate it!!

I have a cousin who never b/f any of her kids, and doesn't understand why I did. When we gave the news of Kane's clefting, she said that she "knew you weren't supposed to b'f while pregnant, its not good for the baby. It just causes problems"

She wasn't being nasty, she just has no information on b/f at all.

But that didn't stop me being devasted....

BUT you know better!!! If you do get to tandem feed, , just smile smugly to yourself, cause you KNOW its right!!!

[kellmay]

As a lady who found breast feeding to hard after trying sooooo hard, i say go girl feed feed feed, just wish i had your problem. stuff 'em you are doing what women all over the world wish they could do.

[gardeningkate]

I am glad to see that I am not the only one. I have found it is interesting to just look confused and ask why, why should I stop, most people don't really know what they are talking about and this becomes clear to everyone including themselves as they grasp at reasons that you need to stop. Give them enough rope, open up the conversation and they will eventually just mubble and wander away!

[Gabi]

I really admire you extended and tandem breastfeeders. Society has taught many of us that b/f is wrong, let alone extended breastfeeding. You are paving the way for us all and hopefully because of your hard work our daughters will not have to face this negativity. Our mothers had to be pioneers and earn our right to birth the way we want to, you are pioneers - earning us the right to nurse the way we want to.

I really want to make it as far as you girls. We've only been nursing for 14 weeks so far, but it's not enough! I want MORE MORE MORE! (and so does my nursling haha).

[DANNIIM]

Hi Lee
Just tell the nosey buggers to bugger off as there comments are warranted and they don't know what they are talking about.
My mum tried to tell my sister to put her DD on the bottle cause she was too little and the reason for it was because of BFing, well anyway she successfully BF her DD for 16 months and she if just a petite framed little girl, anyway my point is that ppl think they know it all cause they have raised all there kids and that warrants giving every other mother there advice...just take it with a pinch of salt hun cause you know you are doing what is right!

GL

[gardeningkate]

I have been on the receiving end of criticism from both teams! With my first one, after a very traumatic birth, which I am only now really beginning to understand, he refused to latch, not just refused but we had very very definate breast refusal which devastated me as I had always assumed that bf is just what you do. So after 6 weeks of expressing and lactation consultants, and being so down from feeling rejected I gave up. I remember constantly getting comments like, oh, your not bf, and little insinuations that I had given up too easily, that I was a bad mother, the but don't you know how good it is for the baby....etc. etc. So I was damned for not. Someone (and old man actually) shook his head at me and said loudly in a cafe young people are so lazy these days, not even feeding their own children. Where were the bottle feeding advocates then, or do they not support but only criticise. Now that my no. 2 DD has taken so well that at 19 months he is still going strong the bottle feeding advocates are crawling all over me. ... don't you know how easy a bottle is..... there is nothing wrong with bottles you know......are you still going to be feeding him when he's 21...... fortunately fellow bfeeders do come out and support me, but I still object to the suggestion that people bottle feed out of laziness, and feel really sad when people are made to feel that their milk is inadequate and end up switching due to misinformation. And having done both, bottles with DD1 and Bf with DD2 I feel I can take them on, yes I do know how easy bottles are, and bf is so much easier! Having said that I wish more women would just be supportive of whatever a fellow woman chooses to do, I love these forums because people are supportive, I must live in a very negative area where my neighbours have nothing better to do than find reasons to critisize. I am now pregant again, and still intend to Bf as long as DD2 wants, and may even tanden feed, part of me wants to do it just to cause a stir, once people have seen it done and get used to me doing it it might not be so foreign to them! Thank you to the person who said we are pioneers, and somewhere there was a mention of milk making superpowers, all very boosting and invigorating thoughts!!