Health nurse says need more formula

[MantaRay]

Big hugs Maz. You have worked so hard, and overcome huge hurdles to be where you are now. It must have killed you to have someone put these doubts in your mind now.

I agree with the others, I wouldn't be adding a bottle just yet. I don't know whether Mateauz needs more weight or not. But I know that MCHNs are often mistaken when they say that. So definitely get a second opinion first. And also remember that those charts are based on ff babies - bf babies will nearly always be lower on the chart. Also, anywhere on the chart is "normal", so even the bottom end is ok. And if something more is needed, then I would be trying more bfs or the calorie fortifier first before adding an extra bottle.

I totally think that the physio could be contributing. Jack was putting on 400g a week in the early days. Then by 3 months he was mobile and went from near the top of the charts to near the bottom! He was still drinking as much, he was just burning it off more quickly. And there's certainly nothing wrong with his weight or health today. And Tom is in the 75th percentile for height and 10th for weight. Nothing wrong with him either - he is just very active.

You have come this far Maz, you will get past this. I know you will. I know that feeling when you hear something like that, but please try not to let it get to you. I suspect she is just being cautious. Get some better advice and I am sure you will be glad you did.

[maz]

thanks so much girls..
Ive been sitting here crying over this....rather silly isnt it but I feel very passionate about BF Mateauz.

I rang the chemist and had a good chat to him...he said that the MCHN should have taken into consideration that Mateauz isnt classed as a 'normal' child due to his Cerapal Palsey and EVERY CHILD is different. He told me not to stop doing what I was doing cause his nappies have all been drneched and he pooh's every day (twice before he got weighed and one was right in front of her).

I have also rung our Physio who is pi$$ed at the MCHN and is looking into the whole calorie thing for me. She agrees that mateauz would burn alot of calories and hench not have as much weight on him due to it. She was also very annoyed at some of the other comments the MCHN said but thats another thread

i cant believe I have gotten so upset about this...I found it really hurtfull . We have been through so much over the last 4 months and just as I felt like things were looking up I felt like we had taken 100 steps back again. Will let you all know how the next appointment goes girls.

And hey thanks...dont know were I'd be without you all

[Visitor7]

That sounds really promising. Just go with your mothers instinct. You know what's best for your little man.
And don't think it's silly that you're so upset about all of this. It's taken a lot for both you and Mateauz to get where you are today with b/f and you don't want to give up. We can all understand that.

[MantaRay]

Maz, I am SO, SO glad to hear that you have now gotten some better advice. It really annoys me when I hear of MCHNs giving bad advice. Another reason why I don't see them anymore!

FWIW I can totally understand your reaction - that stupid woman has basically undermined your courage and determination by suggesting that you are not providing enough nourishment for your beautiful son. And even knowing that she's not right, it's got to hurt. And it is so easy to doubt when we hear things like this, even when our heads know better, our hearts feel unsure. I have had times when I've felt the same way, when I've worried that bm isn't enough. Or that I've done something else wrong. I think it's part of that darn mother-guilt, and medical professionals seem to be able to bring it on ten times worse than other well-meaning but ill-informed busy-bodies. But try really hard not to let it get to you. In a week I am sure you will feel differently about it. I'm sending monster hugs your way. Now stop crying and eat some chocolate!!

[Olive]

maz hun fwiw sophie only put on 800g between 2 and 4 months!! we were and still are in the 15th percentile!! and she's fine!! you doing ace !!!

[Janie]

Maz, big hugs hun. You know how much I feel for you going through this, having BTDT myself. It's great that he's gaining, but yeah, 700g is not a huge amount. Mind you, it's not so little that I would be instantly stressing! I think you need to speak to/see a good LC. BFing and comp feeding can be tricky, but it can be done, as you know. Having a good LC check us out made all the difference to our BFing and DS's weight gains.

Obviously it's important for Mateauz that he gains weight well, but I'm sure that you can continue to BF for as long as you want to hun! You can do it Maz, you just might need a bit of help along the way Keep trying the ABA, but given M's history, I think a LC is in order. Maybe PM Barb and see if she can recommend someone.

Here for you anytime matey

ETA sorry, should have read the thread properly hun! So glad that you have received better advice, that's wonderful Keep on keeping on, you're doing a terrific job Maz!

[*Efjay*]

Maz, you have my number women... I know its long distance BUT YOU HAVE MY NUMBER!

The one thing I am going to suggest if you feel the need to get an exxtra feed in there but would rather avoid another bottle is expressing an extra feed for him. In the mornings when your milk is high. Express while he feeds at the other breast. Also you may like to try supplementing him at the breast with a supply line. Although, with his tongue it may be tricky.

Please ring me if you need too! I was about to jump up & get the phone to call you but I will wait, I wont bug you for the 2nd day in a row LOL but please call if you want to chat.

[Muppity]

Oh Maz

Hugs for you. I was so angry when I read your first post but I got a little better after the second one. Glad that there are people that agree with you.

Firstly, and most importantly, he is gaining weight and so what if he is at a low percentile. They exist because babies fall into heaps of ranges - they are not one size fits all.

Secondly, follow your instincts. You know what is right for him and you and he have been working so hard with BF and it is working. Trust yourself.

[suse]

Maz, want me to come and give your MCHN a darn good slapping? I will, really I will.

I had the same thing with Euan, the MCHN wanted me on motilium, or comp feeding him, because he was putting on a bit less than the average, and he cluster fed at night (sounds pretty normal, right). My doctor said he'd keep an eye on his weight but otherwise not to worry, he seemed fine based on the other factors. He asked me if I hadn't been told that he wasn't gaining enough, would I have been worried. And the answer was no. What does your gut tell you about Mateauz?

Some MCHNs scare the bejeezus out of people by looking at a single factor (eg weight) and not considering anything else.

You're doing great hon!!!

[~Raven~]

Maz I'm so glad to see your update. I have been worried sick about you after the chat we had. That MCHN sounds like a beast!

Te chemist sounds like he has his head screwed on right. Yes every child is different and they shouldn't have to fit into an ideal mould set by what one MCHN sees as ideal.

I hope the physio can get some accurate info for you in regards to if he is burning up extra calories from his excercises. It sounds so logical to me that would be the cause of part of it!
I'm sure after you talk to the paed he will be able to put your mind at ease. You are doing an awesome job with him on all levels and for someone to undermine your confidence in your parenting abilities the way that MCHN did (not just the feeding part ) is just not on. The woman needs a total attitude adjustment and I hope you get the info you need to sock it to her!

[Barb Glare]

Hi,

You are doing a fabulous job - never forget that. There should actually be a medal struck for mums like you. ON mothers day it should be you on the 6 o'clock news with a tiara and a cape - not some celebrity mum.
Did the health nurse talk to you about how you could increase your supply? Many of us make assumptions about what would suit *us* if we were in that position. So maybe she saw - busy mum with babe with cerebal palsy and other kids - giving a formula bottle anyway and thought that it would be just "easier" if you gave another bottle - but you want to keep breastfeeding. She should have asked you what you wanted out of the situation and not assumed.
After 3mnths it is normal for babies to gain "around 100g" so his weightgain is normal. but he was just on a low base, I'd say after his illness.
How many times does he feed in 24hrs? Would you be prepared to scruch in a couple of extra little feeds - could make a difference

Regards
Barb