I know how you feel sezjm. Alot of my friends and family think I'm crazy. Even my gp asked me the other day when I plan on stopping bfing. I went to get a script for more motilium and I had to convince her again. She also told me I could start Lily on solids and then I wouldn't need to bf!!! Grrr, I need all the support I can get this isn't easy and I get this from the very people who should be supporting me the most. I must admit though that my DH has been really good lately. He will feed her a bottle when she neds one but will sit and watch her feed when she having a bf, it's really lovley .
Glad to hear Nicholas is going so well. Remember that you are doing the best you can and we can do no more than that. Rather than beat yourself up, accept that and things get easier. They did for me anyway! You are a perfect mumma for your little man, don't be so hard on yourself ((hugs)) . But I do know how you're feeling.