Feeding a nearly 5yo here, I soooo hear ya! DS has been limited for some time now - when I've started to have enough I count down the sucks. I was starting at about 4, but that was creating lots of angst, so now, at the suggestion of an ABA counsellor who fed older children, I'm counting down from 10 to a rocket ship blast-off
I just feel so tired if I feed him more than once a day and feed DD as well. So, his feeds are the ones that are sacrificed, not hers.
Thing is, he is so attached to BFing that I can guarantee absolute cooperation if I threaten to take Babu away from him - I don't use threats or rewards in parenting my kids, but when the chips are down and he's really throwing his weight around I tell him I will have to stop feeding him. And I probably would follow through, too, because at those moments I just don't want to have his rudeness around me!
There was no answer in that, just commiserations