There is definitely a drain on your body when you're making milk for two - even if one of them is only feeding once a day. The penny only dropped for me recently. If DS ramps up to more than one feed a day, I'm just knackered and grumpy and really snappy Wouldn't be so bad if we lived in a world that supported tandem feeding, but in this world, you get no extra concessions for BFing two, even with a partner who supports BFing!
Just a thought, if you're feeling grumpy from feeding two, are you drinking enough water and eating enough? I only feed one and i have to eat and drink quite often or I get grumpy.
I think that if you are only feeding a toddler, you are more in control. You can either feed them or say "wait until after dinner mate", and it's your call.
But I can well imagine that if I were also feeding a little one then that would be a battle - my DS would be unlikely to cooperate with "I have to wait until after dinner but that small yelping baby-thing gets to have my booboo now!".
I have a feeling that even if you wean your older ones it won't make things much easier - they will still want you and your time and your attention and to climb all over you- it just won't involve feeding......
Oh, I hear you! As you know, currently tandem feeding my princesses: 26 months and 11 weeks.
When I was pregnant DD1 cut down a lot as my milk decreased so at the end she was only having one feed a day. She has always been booby obsessed though and I didn't think she'd wean when I was pregnant.
After DD2 came along I decided to stick to one feed a day, I didn't want to increase it and be feeding all day. In the first week after DD2 was born I did give her more feeds though because I needed help with engorgement and I also wanted some special time with her and to give her comfort and reassurance with all the change that was going on. That was ok and she easily went back to having one feed again. DH was home for a month and there was lots of visitors anyway so she was busy and not that interested.
Over the last month though she has been wanting it more and more!! It's always 'Mummy, need some booby. Make me feel better!!!' I try and distract her and tell her she has booby only after dinner and sometimes that works but most of the time she cracks it and cries and says 'I need some Mummy, it makes me feel better' which really pulls on my heartstrings
Anyways I'm a bit random and sometimes I'm feeling alright and don't mind feeding her and so I let her have more which I think is a mistake. I need to be more consistent and maybe make 2 feed times that are ok with me and that she can predict like after nap and after bath or something. One feed doesn't seem to be enough because if she asks in the morning then 'after dinner' seems a loooong time away for a toddler.
She is the same and wanting to feed for ages too. I'm not sure what's with that. She never ends any of her feeds anymore, I do, I don't think she'd ever finish, lol. I do the counting to 10 thing too and then if she comes off with no fuss kiss her and praise her and tell her how proud I am, which she likes.
Anyways, I don't know the solution but I totally get you
Charlie - it's the hormones and the way the extra production has its effect, more than nutrition. Hormones are a *****! My hormones prioritise the littlest one, but are still working to accommodate the biggest one. They're probably as conflicted as I am (the hormones, that is!)..!
My DS has just (I think....) self weaned at 3 and a bit. And this weaning process was very much based on the drop in supply that came with him getting too interested in other things to feed. And then finding that when he returned a day or two later there wasn't much there, so he was even less interested next time.
I think that if you have another child maintaining the supply there is probably much less likelihood of this process happening - you may even find that your two wean together when the younger one is ready.
Maya - have you considered encouraging your DD to feed less often? It might be much less traumatic for her to drop a feed or two than for her brother to drop his last one - and you would still lose the extra production drain on you.
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Wouldn't be so bad if we lived in a world that supported tandem feeding, but in this world, you get no extra concessions for BFing two, even with a partner who supports BFing!
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