DS was born at 7pm last night with a vacumn delivery. He was quite unsettled and has a nasty bruise on his head and we weren't able to get him to latch on whilst we were recovering in the birth suite. The midwife then thought it was because of my positioning (I was hooked up to drips etc so couldn't really move much) and said to try him again when we got back to our room. Once we were put in our room I tried again as he was sucking on my arm and all around my breast but I still couldn't get him to latch so I called a midwife in. She didnt have any success in getting him to latch either and basically bullied me into giving him formula as she said I was starving him as it had been 5 hours since his birth at this point. From my limited experience the problem seems to be I have big breasts (F cup) but only have small nipples. I'm currently wearing nipple extenders to try and help this but I don't know what else to do and really don't feel supported by the hospital. I really want us to have a successful bf journey but I'm stressed that we are already off to a bad start and I'm not going to be able to do this. Adding to my worries is we tried hand expressing and only got a tiny drop of colustrom so what if I don't have anything there to give him?
Hi,
You’ve both had a rough start, but you will get through this. You know how the birth has left you feeling? Well, your little one is feeling much the same - it’s not the way his “internal blueprint” told him the birth would go - he’s been left sore and disorrientated. It’s not surprising that just now he can’t work out how to suck or what to do next. The good news is that he will recover. It’s not anything about your breasts, neither the size of the breast or your nipples). It’s nothing about your positioning. Today is another day. Deep breathe! Keep your little one skin to skin - he will use less energy that way and he will be right there when he shows signs of readiness to feed. Ring that bell and reiterate to the midwife that breastfeeding is important to you and now you are concerned that you are off to a bad start. Ask her to teach you/help you to express. Express by hand every 3 hours today and get those precious drops into your baby. Was he full term? Sometimes with babies who have had a bit of trauma and/or who are a bit early a nipple shield can help get you started. Ask your midwife to help you give that a try. And ask to see the Lactation Consultant. Let us know how to go and feel welcome to ask questions
Congratulations on your baby! Keep him skin to skin whenever you can, all day if possible. It will help with your hormones and him learning your smell, and its just nice to share time with you baby.
Get visitors to stay away for a day or two so you can both get to know each other, and get your strength back.
Barb and Hoti thank you so much. They were exactly the words I needed to hear this morning as I was very emotional and feeling a bit traumatised from the birth and felt like I was failing him but your advice gave me the confidence to try again and have some faith in myself. The day shift midwifes are much more supportive and I am happy to say we got him to latch on. I'm still unable to get him on myself but the midwives are happy for me to buzz them for every feed until we get the hang of it. I've told all visitors to stay away for now to give us a chance to learn how to do this properly
Congrats on the birth of your gorgeous boy Em I'm so glad the day midwives are nice and supportive and you've had some success! And I wanted to say good on you for asking visitors to stay away until you're ready, you're doing a wonderful job!
I was going to say the same as Barb & HotI, have skin to skin with him as much as possible. You know no one is coming in, so have him in just a nappy on your bare chest. When he's feeling up to it he'll start rooting for the breast - he may find it on his own after a while or he may need some help. I know with DD she was on there immediately, but with DS he'd get close then kind of fall away, I had to kind of make sure his head couldn't go too far and hold the nipple there for him.
But, it sounds like you're doing wonderfully, keep up the good work! Get as much support, help and information as you possibly can while you've got midwives you trust around you.
Great to hear you've been getting more help
Laid-back nursing might really be helpful for you in getting the hang of latching - you can recline in bed or on the couch, for eg, support yourself with cushions, pillows or whatever and put baby on your chest and let him have a go. If you try when he's calm, you may find he will find the breast and latch on perfectly all on his own. Once he's got the hang of it, then feeding him istting up (or however you want to do it) will be much easier.
All the best
From my DDs first feed until we left the hospital 4 days later I beeped the nurses in for every feed, I didnt care if it was day or night! I wanted to make sure we could do it properly. Once we were home my DH helped latch her on for the first week. Make sure u ask for help whenever you need it and dont feel bad! Congratulations!!
Agree with Reet, while you are there call them EVERY feed. Also ask about support for when you leave hospital. Do they offer an post natal service? Or a lactation consultant you can have contact with.
Like Barb said, the poor little one had a traumatic experience too so he's going to be very confused. Lucky for him he has you
Em I only just saw this thread and I'm glad things have already improved. I agree with the skin to skin advice. When I had DD (my first child) I was obsessed with 'positioning' the baby as were 90% of the midwives it seemed! We had difficulty establishing (pain free) feeding too (also a vacuum delivery, after a very long labour) and things only really started to turn around after I gave up on the whole 'let's get the body in this position and the chin in this position relative to the nipple' etc etc and allowed baby and myself to sort of feel our way into what was instinctively comfortable. That did take time and really only happened once we were home from the hospital and after a couple of visits from a super lactation consultant who made me feel so much more confident just through her enthusiasm and encouragement alone.
Thanks everyone. I am happy to say we are still improving. We are still having problems with latching but once he is on he is having really good feeds. I am so grateful for the 2 midwifes I have had helping me today as they really have made all the difference with my confidence. I def need to learn to trust my instincts. There is no post natal service offered here but as I am private I am allowed to stay for 5 days if need be so I'm hoping my milk comes in during the time I am here as I've been told it all changes again once that happens.
Em, remember you can always call the ABA helpline - 1800-686-268. Are you in the metro area? There are breastfeeding clinics around the Perth area, as well as a number of lactation consultants in private practice if you need more help once you're out of hospital.
All the best
Oh Em I didn't know you were in Perth? So am I. My home visiting LC was independent- it was organised by my hospital (SJOG Subiaco) but the company was independent.
ETA let me know if you want me to PM you her details.
Well we had a rather interesting night. DS is now latching like a pro and having good feeds but last night he was very unsettled between feeds and my instinct was telling me he had tummy pain. As I had only had 5 hours sleep since the morning of his bday once it hit 2am and we were still awake I caved and called the nightshift midwife (same one as the night before) for some advice on what we can do who told me I was starving him and its not about me and what I want and he needs formula. I'm so thankful for my lovely supportive day shift midwifes as I was able to stand my ground and insist that he had recently had a half hour feed so he certainly wasn't at starving levels. She then told me that I mustn't have any colostrum there so he was probably sucking for nothing ( nice midwife had already told me that newborns wouldn't suck for that long if there wasn't anything there as its a big effort for them) so I made her hand express me and we got 8mls so at least I proved there was something there. We have had good feeds today and now that we have had some time to recover from the birth and get to know each other we seem to be finding our groove. My milk has started to come in so once we get over that hurdle we will go home and continue our journey. I'm just shocked that a midwife would be so anti bf and think formula is the answer??
Mad B snd LL I'm in the Peel region so ill ask what services are down this way for when I leave. Ill def remember the ABA as well. I want to become a member as I'm hoping they may have a group down this say so I can meet some local Mums.
Well we had a rather interesting night. DS is now latching like a pro and having good feeds but last night he was very unsettled between feeds and my instinct was telling me he had tummy pain. As I had only had 5 hours sleep since the morning of his bday once it hit 2am and we were still awake I caved and called the nightshift midwife (same one as the night before) for some advice on what we can do who told me I was starving him and its not about me and what I want and he needs formula. I'm so thankful for my lovely supportive day shift midwifes as I was able to stand my ground and insist that he had recently had a half hour feed so he certainly wasn't at starving levels. She then told me that I mustn't have any colostrum there so he was probably sucking for nothing ( nice midwife had already told me that newborns wouldn't suck for that long if there wasn't anything there as its a big effort for them) so I made her hand express me and we got 8mls so at least I proved there was something there. We have had good feeds today and now that we have had some time to recover from the birth and get to know each other we seem to be finding our groove. My milk has started to come in so once we get over that hurdle we will go home and continue our journey. I'm just shocked that a midwife would be so anti bf and think formula is the answer??
Mad B snd LL I'm in the Peel region so ill ask what services are down this way for when I leave. Ill def remember the ABA as well. I want to become a member as I'm hoping they may have a group down this say so I can meet some local Mums.
Urgent help needed-DS won't latch
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I'm so glad the day midwives are nice and supportive and you've had some success! And I wanted to say good on you for asking visitors to stay away until you're ready, you're doing a wonderful job!
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