Do you have any clues about why you might have felt that way? Do you have issues of abuse in your past? Do you have issues about your body?

I think it's worth going over this with a counsellor, even now before you get pregnant, to try to work through what thoughts and underlying beliefs might have been contributing to your feelings.

And if you can't get past it, and you can't manage to breastfeed, well, you'll have done the best you can, and that's all you can do.