Good on you MB.
I can understand your frustrations with BF. It's not easy for everyone early on. My dd had trouble latching, she would scream for 8 hrs non stop and we had six weeks of 1.5hrly feeds day and night. I was so close to giving up but the benefits of BF for my dd outweighed the struggles for me and we pushed through and survived it. She is now nearly 15 months and Monday was the last time she had a bf. She is rarely ever sick and I feel so proud of our achievements and giving her the very best start in life. You're doing a great job. It's hard if noone around you is BF and can understand your struggles but You will get loads of support from women on BB who have been through similar experiences. Keep up the great work