Nikki, i just re-read your post. You had "breastfeeding" and "failure" in the same sentence so i feel compelled to post again.

Honey, listen to me, you have already been expressing like a trooper.
You have succeeded ALREADY hon.
Your bubs have already received your colostrum.
Fullstop.
Even if they never get another drop of your BM, THEY GOT THE COLOSTRUM.
that stuff is GOLD - and it's only a few drops. So valuable for their health.

Take one day at a time.

However long you breastfeed for, it's all a success, be it three hours, three days, three weeks, three months, three years.

it's not a competition

there are so many things mums beat themselves up about (i know, cos i did it too).

but take the bf-ing one day at a time

you are doing so well, and you're doing it double with twins, plus they're premmies

I really want to congratulate you for where you are with bf-ing RIGHT NOW, don't think too far ahead. Thinking about TODAY is enough for now.

You've just had twins, You've just delivered premmies, Your milk has just come in, you're swamped with hormones, it's a HUGE time for you hon. And the thought of being separated from your premmies, while they get big enough to be allowed home - i can well understand why you're anxious.

remember to breathe sweetie.

aba helpline - 1800 686 2 686
I wish i could afford to give every new mum, a subscription to ABA, they send you this great magazine called ESSENCE every two months, every page is all about mums breastfeeding, articles about every aspect of bf-ing you could imagine.
ANd i love the ABA calendars, had them on my kitchen wall, beautiful bf-ing photos that really boosted me, when i was alone with my bub day after day.

the lack of illnesses, using a breastfeed instead of painkillers when they hurt themselves, so glad we went this route.