Hugs I hear you. I have only had two but that is it for me. My family is complete, so I know I will never have a labour. And am still not sure how I feel about it. But i made the decidion to go ahead with my 2nd cs, when a vbac was not going to happen. Sometimes I wish I was able to have done it differently, but I know i made the right call at the time. Sorry I can't be more help. Just wanted you to know you are not alone.

All the best for your birth.