I really don't want them to spend the holidays in their rooms but...

[Calluna]

When I used to work in a day care centre, my dad suggested that we cover all the walls in velcro and put them in fluffy clothes and stick the kids to it.

Other than that I'm sorry but I have no advice. Just wanted to offer you some big 's. It can't be easy, but I'm sure you'll get through it and do the best job you possibly can.

[Lulu]

I'd keep going with the zero tolerance . That's what I'm doing and I'm dreading the holidays too....

DS is responding well cos he knows I mean business.

[C~Q]

Yep thats what I reckon too! And it;'s easier for me!
Heather - love your Dads suggestion lol!

[Lulu]

If I find velcro wall blankets I'll let you know

[Jahzara]

I havent got any advice sorry - its alot like that in our house too !

Will be watching this to see if anyone has any ideas

Goodluck !
xo

[kawazuki]

ok set up a roster.
ds gets control over choice of games activity etc from 10-12 say then from 1-3 DD chooses, between 12-1 its what mum says and lunch time so sit down and eat, make it fun lunch even fruit sticks and sandwhiches cut into cool shapes etc. DS loves this he is 9.

time before 10 is individual play so they can read or do whatever, but if arguing occurs they loose their privilage to choose an activity.
after 3 is settle down time, afternoon snack, and outside time. its amazing what you can get them to do and just remind them if they argue they loose the privilage of choosing an activity.

if it makes it easier for you give them a choice of 3 or 4 things you can all do and then let them choose one.

i do this with DS i give him 3 options and he chooses, they could be, go to the pool, go for a ride or play down teh park with the footy etc. his choice then i remind him we all do it as a family but your leading the activity.. he likes the idea of being the leader.

then i say ok DD's choice now she is only 2 but will choose something given the option and i get DS to play with us as a family and he has to follow.

teaches them both respect, leadership adn that it isnt always your way compramise is key in life..


and a good bottle of red at the end of teh night helps as well.

oh adn cooking, DS would cook all day if he got to decorate the cake and eat the icing lol

[C~Q]

Kawazuki - thanks heaps those are some great suggestions! I spoke to them today about changing the way they speak to each other. Because a lot of the time they're not even arguing or fighting but it sounds like they are IYKWIM? Instead of just saying "no" quietly they will both blow up straight away and scream "NO" and then the kicking starts...

Agghhhh!

And Lulu - I just googled velcro wall blankets and up came this post lol!

[kawazuki]

thats it.
i tell DS that all the time, its not WHAT h says but HOW he has said it which is not nice.