I agree with kaz about this. I think it is more than jsut a little phase and if it is causing a rift between you and DH then it definitely needs to be addressed further.

She is definitely crying out for DH's attention in anyway she knows how. When your DH came home from the shops after she was upset what happened then. Did they have a little talk??

Has he ever thought about maybe acting how a child would act when she is being hurtful towards him? I know that sounds strange and I am by no means a child pshychologist but I do work with children every day and anything is worth a go.

What I kind of mean is if she does something to hurt him maybe he could get upset in front of her and tell her that she has hurt her daddy's feelings. etc.

I really am not sure. Children are complex little things. I hope you guys can get through this. Sounds like you are doing everything you can and just continue to support your DH and your relationship as best you can. Big sweetie.