GiGi, What you need to do is ask him to leave. OR you need to find the stength to tell him you want to leave. There is n o reason at all why Biilby can't still have her dad. Good on you for wanting to keep that relationship between them alive. its important.
I think it may possibly give him a kick up the butt to change. YOu need to realise you can cope just fine on your own & He needs to know you have realised this. Sounds to me like he has possibly made you feel you can't get by with out him & thats just crap. there is Sooooo much out there to support single mums.