Advice needed: Stopping feeding to sleep for day sleep

[Snowy Love]

OK, so I think the time has come to cut out feeding DS to sleep for his day sleep.

I don't know how to go about it though - Sleeping like a baby says to gradually take him off before he falls asleep, but if I try to disconnect him he gets really upset.

Until Monday I was feeding him while I surfed the net, now his race car bed is here I lie down on it with him (same as night - we've just moved from my bed to his since Monday). At night he doesn't fall asleep on the boob, but gets on & off and eventually rolls over and goes to sleep.

My reasons aren't that good from DS's POV - We need to get going on TTC #2 (AF hasn't returned yet), I want to stop expressing at work - I'm not getting much anymore and he isn't fed to sleep 2 or 3 day sleeps a week - childcare pat him to sleep (I think they're still doing this haven't checked recently) and he falls asleep in the car or pram if we're out at sleep time.

I think part of my problem is I don't have any other settling techniques in my arsenal - I try to pat him to sleep (and he joins in wacking his own bot), but end up giving up and bring out the big guns as it were. Can anyone help with gentle techniques to settle a toddler?

Thanks - sorry its so disjointed.

[Jac]

Could you try to seperate the feed time and the putting to sleep time so that even if he fall asleep while feeding you could then change his nappy or rouse him and read a book before putting him to bed? Then try patting like they do at childcare. May take a while though! I think the key is to put him to bed awake and use a few different settling techniques to find the one that works (patting, shusshing, stoke back/face, singing). May be harder, or take a little longer at your DS's age if he is used to feeding to sleep for day naps though. I would see what childcare have found to work.

[Snowy Love]

Thanks Jac. I (inadvertantly) tried settling him after his feed today - he didn't fall asleep on the boob but he wouldn't settle - turned out there was a grasshopper inside the pocket of his nappy. I think I'm going to have to get DH to take a few days off and help me as he just won't go to sleep for me without boob.

[Jac]

Is he having one or two day naps? If two, maybe try a later nap (lunchtime) so he will be really tired and therefore maybe easier to settle (?) as he is approaching an age where he might move to one nap. Poor little tyke with the grasshopper - that's not gonna help your settling!!

[DoubleK]

Hi Malakili, i am also trying to wean Krystal from feeding to sleep - both nap time, and bed time.
im just starting to look into some different techniques to try.

sorry no advice to offer, but just letting you know your not alone!

good luck with it!

[~Raven~]

I went through a similar thing with Caleb with the day sleep as well as night time.

The way I got trough it was to try putting him to sleep without a feed. I'd offer him a drink of water first so I knew he wasn't thirsty. Give him a teddy to cuddle and "sleep time" now, kiss and walk out.

I was surprised at how easily he took to the new routine, though the first few days he found it hard to self settle. Sometimes he had other ideas and stand up and cry. I'd get him up then and try again to put him down for a sleep in 5 -10 mins.
Sometimes he doesn't go off to sleep straight away and will chatter in his cot awake for a while but he goes to sleep in about 10 mins. I'm talking about chatter here too not crying, big difference IMO.

Now I watch for his tired signs. He's easy to read because he sticks his thumb in his eye When I put him in bed he giggles so I know he's happy to go down.

[MantaRay]

That's a good point Sam. It is much easier to get them down before they are too tired. Maybe try starting the pre-bed routine a bit earlier and see if that helps. GL.

[Snowy Love]

Thanks ladies. The problem is more me not giving in and feeding when he cries. He's had a cold the past week, now he's well (and with your tips) we'll try again.