Hi girls. I thought I would give an update on our sleeping.
It is SOOOOO much better this week! I had to make some pretty dramatic alterations to the way I was doing things, but with gentle persistance and a step by step approach, DD is now self settling and only waking once in the night (after 8.5 hours). Her naps have also improved to at least an hour...
So....this is what I did.
Step 1: STOP feeding to sleep! I swapped feeds to the start of her cycle (yes, a feed, play then sleep routine). I instead rocked her to sleep or used the sling. This took only a few days for her to get the idea that feeding and sleep don't go together. I also had to wake her up as she was feeding (I suspect DD used to often fall asleep before she was finished, because now she takes both sides at more feeds).
Step 2: Experiment with ways of soothing DD in her cot. Now this one was HARD. Of course we are all about gentle parenting, and no-cry solutions, so this took some patience and a lot of picking her up and trying something new. I tried patting, rocking the whole frame of the cot, but found holding her hands and placing my cheek to hers and speaking lovingly into her ear, she stopped crying instantly. I had to do this over quite a few days so she was only crying for a short spurts as I tried to find out our no-cry solution to settling in the cot.
Step 3: Put DD to sleep in the cot ALL THE TIME. I had to stay home for a few days and stop using the sling etc.
Step 4: Put DD to sleep in the cot when she shows tired signs. When she cries comfort her, but stop BEFORE she falls asleep. So its a real start-stop approach. Start comforting when she cries and stop when she stops. This took persistance but it means DD learnt that she was ok, I was ALWAYS there and she could fall asleep on her own.
Step 5: know the difference between whinging and crying and try and ignore the whinging. Now most people would complain if there were put to bed without any say in it, and my DD does whinge a little sometimes, but its like a grizzle and stops after about 10 seconds or so, and might start again. Its like a gurgle, gurgle, gurgle. I call it her sleep story, but I am hovering like a hawk until she falls alseep to make sure I am right there as soon as she cries.
Soo...that's it. It felt a little bit harder on her than I ever thought I would be. But she never cried for more than 20 seconds during this process and was ALWAYS comforted, and the results have been phenomenal. Last night she went to bed with eyes wide open and was asleep within 5 minutes without a peep. That is SUCH an improvement on 40 minutes of settling.
It has also improved our experience of the car and the pram. She no longer screams at me when she is tired and can nod off on her own.
I hope this is helpful to others, because it has transformed my life!!!
I an new to this. I have a 3 month old that doesn't sleep during the day more than 15-20 mins at each nap time. Therefore is extremely tired all day. I used to rock her to sleep and she had the dummy, which the child health nurse advised has caused my problems.
she said that when my daughter gets to her next sleep cycle and wakes up she cannot put herself back to sleep as she has relied on me.
We are in the process of day 2 of control crying. Very hard thing to do. She fell asleep last night after an hour of crying. I tried to put her down for a nap this morning. Another hour of crying with only 20 minutes of sleep. Tried this afternoon. Another 50 minutes of crying with only 20 minutes of sleep. She lasted 15 minutes after that and is now very tired and jerky. Put her down again, but don't think I can listen to her cry for another hour as her cries are now so hoarse.
Has anyone tried any no cry sleeping techniques that work?
I need to join this thread too. I just wrote a new thread about asking how to get him to sleep longer but I have spoken in another thread to Anna about the constant exhaustion of constantly having to craddle & wear the baby etc.
Hi Oleary...If you want my advice, I would stop the control crying now!!!
There ARE gentle ways of helping your baby sleep. Have you read through the steps I took? My baby went from sleeping 30 mins ONLY in the day to having two 2+ hour sleeps a day (she has been asleep for the last 2 hours). I also recommend the No Cry Sleep solution book if you can get your hands on it (try the local library).
Where are you based? I can give you the number of a great place in Melbourne that offer a mentor style sleep support in your home. They adapt their methods to suit your parenting style.
Its ok if your baby needs you to help them sleep, but you CAN improve on how they fall asleep so they stay asleep, and all without crying.
I agree with Anna, I wouldn't do the CC IMO, but I've been there too, I did try it and I think I cried more than DD! Plus it didn't work and she got really clingy because of it, I really wish I could take it back.
There are gentle ways of helping your DD to nap longer, I also recommend the no cry sleep solution book, get it!
At three months old most babies catnap, it's frustrating but she will grow out of it. To try and help her sleep longer you could wait outside her room at the 15-20 minute mark, when she stirs quickly go in and pat her bottom, put her dummy back in, pick her up and rock her or breastfeed her back to sleep.
i agree with you about the control crying. Never liked it, but was advised by my health nurse that it would help my daughter sleep longer during the day.
Going to go back to the dummy and rocking ways to put her to sleep but wait the 15-20 minute mark and put the dummy back in. I put her down earlier tonight as she was exausted but woke after 20 minutes but put her dummy back in a couple of times as she kept spitting it out and waited until she went quiet and spit it out again and caught it before it hit the bed.
Going away over easter so will definitely get the book when I get home.
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thread to Anna about the constant exhaustion of constantly having to craddle & wear the baby etc.
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