Having been told by my own mother that I am a bad mummy because DS didn't sleep through by 8 weeks, I ignore people who tell me what children "should" be doing and that my parenting damages my son.
DS hates sleep too. He still uses a buggy for day sleeps at home - but LOVES the cot at nursery. Hmm, wonder if his carer would do bedtime at home if I paid her? He sleeps pretty well now, usually one bad night a week if that, but he used to be up for a good 4-5 hours of his 11-hour main sleep.
I second the idea that intelligent babies don't like sleep, they're too busy practicing their skills.
Ness, I have to walk away and let DS scream while I calm down some nights - I'd rather me calm down than scream at him, because I feel worse then. Although DS laughs at me, but that makes me madder.
The laughing is definatley worse! Sometimes DD will wake in the middle of the night happy as and ready to play!I just have to walk away and let her have a little party in her cot by herself untill she's ready (ie.cries out!) for me to rewrap her up!
Another thing my DH always says is 'people lie'.He thinks people will only tell you what they want you to know and not the real truth.I guess we're lucky to have forums like this and it helps to have a few honest friends as well!
Ness, our paed says that people lie too LOL! He says that there's no way MOST babies are always sleeping through by 12 months.........they're just not develpmentally ready for it.
Just wanted to say DO NOT think any more about what that lady told you about her fabulous sleeping babies! How wonderful for her to have babies that did that but how she thought that telling you all about it was helping you I do not know.
I could barely believe it myself when I read it - there are some great sleepers in my mother's group but they don't match that!
My DS was also a lousy sleeper and nothing would drive me mad more than people telling me smugly how great their babies were at sleeping - the obvious implication being that I was doing something wrong. It's so hard when your baby doesn't sleep as much as they are "supposed" to be sleeping, you feel jealous of the mothers that have babies that do sleep that much and you can't help but question yourself. It's soul destroying.
DS also did the very short naps and I found that I felt much better mentally when I didn't fight it even though the constant interrupted sleep was always a factor and I had days where I couldn't stand the sound of myself either because I had such a short fuse. When DS was about 11 months or so he suddenly started sleeping for longer - 2 to 3 hours at a nap time, and it was nothing we did, he just did it on his own. Mind you, that was when he started cutting out naps during the day and going to bed later at night.
Hang in there. One thing we did find helped us was that if DS was not asleep in about 20 minutes after trying to put him down, he wasn't going to sleep...so we would get him up and try again in a while.
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