Co-Sleep?????????

[Fig]

We started sleeping with DD (2.5 yrs) when she was around 10 months. Similar reasons to what others have said, easier, last resort, etc. Best thing she ever insisted on. She still sleeps with us for part of the night. DS (5 months) has slept with us since birth so 4 in the bed. Bonding between the two siblings is amazing, in the morning the first thing either of them do is look for the other one. When they realise they are both awake they laugh and giggle together. It is the best family time of the day when we all wake up together.

Honestly i don't understand the need/want for it?! maybe im a horrible mum but i believe that the reason my child has a room and a cot is to sleep in it! and i think its part and parcel of them growing up and becomming independant! once they reach a certain age they are no longer babies anymore!

This is my opinion but independence and growing up aren't exclusive to where you sleep. My DD is one of the most fiercely independent 2 years olds you will meet. Toilet trained herself, gets her own brekky, dresses herself etc. At night though, she wakes up and needs the reassurance that her security (her parents) are there. Yes from an adult perspective we are in the same house, but from her point of view, she wakes up, she misses us or is frightened from a dream, she wants a cuddle. Why would I deny her that just because it happens to be dark outside. I would certainly never let her sit by herself for hours on end in her bedroom during the day missing us.

There will come a time developmentally where she no longer needs this reassurance and will sleep in her bedroom all night long. She will also probably tell me I embarrass her and want me to drop her off around the corner from school so no-one sees her daggy mum.

[yummymummy]

and do your husbands mind having to share? Honestly do they mind? because im thinking that co-sleeping is mainly the mum's idea! (any dads out there???)

I was very against the idea but the hospital I had my daughter at was very pro-co-sleeping and even got us to do it in the ward - I was petrified I'd roll on her! When my DD started with the colic and reflux DH suggested we try co-sleeping and still loves it that we do it. It really does create an amazing bond. Wouldn't have it any other way now!! Not sure how we'll do it with two but have loved reading people's suggestions on here

[yummymummy]

Well dh and I have coslept with each other for ten years and it hasn't impacted our independence.

what a good quote!!

[sleepyljm]

Good on you Fig! There is no harm co-sleeping (i believe) if you and your DP and happy doing so.

[skeetaboat]

I started doing it because it makes night-waking so easy.

I haven't stopped (DS is 2y 9mo) because we just can't bear to stop, we love it too much.

We've had various configurations with the aim of moving DS to his own bed. His mattress in our room on the floor. His mattress in his own room and one of us ending up in his bed or him ending up in our bed. Me and the new baby moving to the spare room (not enough room for 4, especially with a newborn as I'm a bit more paranoid about bedding/pillows/rolling at that age) while DH & DS stay in our bed.

Yup, we do all sorts of bed hopping in this household, lol.

We keep saying to each other, "ok, this week we're going to start being strict and get him in his own bed"... but somehow it never happens. We just love the snuggling, the stories before bed, the small hands on your chest as you sleep. Lately I have been missing my DS (now that I'm in the other bed). And DH too of course lol. I think it's time to be realistic and invest in a King size bed. I don't think we'll finish up co-sleeping any time soon.

I think co-sleeping will be one of my favourite parenting memories when I get older and the kids are grown up.

[allycat06]

Reasons?
For me it wasn't really a conscious 'choice', it's something my family has always done. My sister and I co-slept with our parents and they did the same with their parents. I was really surprised when I found out co-sleeping was considered a rather 'crunchy' concept, to me it was normal and I thought everyone did it. It wasn't something DH had grown up but once I explained it to him he decided it made perfect sense and was quite happy with the idea.

Co sleeping doesn't necessarily mean sharing a bed, it can just be sharing a room as well. We do a bit of both. DS has slept in our room from day 1, first in a bassinette and now a cot, this is where he has day naps and goes down to sleep at night. If he wakes up during the night (which is at least twice a night) he comes into our bed. For us it's convenient, we don't have to keep going to another room to check on him during the night (I still get paranoid and check he's breathing several times a night) and if he cries it's just a case of popping him in the bed and feeding. I couldn't think of anything more tiring than having to keep going to another room to settle him. Having a baby is bloody hard work, so if there is anything that can make my life easier then I'll be doing it, co-sleeping means both DS and I get more, less broken sleep.

How long?
We haven't put a timeline on this, as long as we need to I guess. When DS outgrows the cot we'll probably just put a little mattress on our bedroom floor for him until he's ready for his own room. My sister co-slept until she was 6, she's now a very independent young woman.

More babies?
We don't want another for a least 4 years so hopefully this will not be an issue but if we needed to we could make it work and start off with the same arrangement we have now (cot in our room). Lots of people do it. Lucky we have a king size bed!

I personally don't see the fascination with trying to make babies 'independent' from day one, they are so reliant on us for everything at first it doesn't make sense to try and push that away, it's my way of showing him I love him. I am never concerned all of this will make DS clingy and always reliant on me, quite the opposite actually.

[fionas]

It happened accidentally for me really. DD was in our room anyway but DP decided one night that he and DD would sleep in the spare room so I could get some sleep that night. I found them both in bed together in the morning and they looked so cute that I decided to try it myself. I figured if big, noisy DP hadn't woken her or rolled on to her, then surely I would be pretty safe.

I just loved it. DD slept through the night from a pretty early age but I found that she would become unsettled at around midnight so it was just really nice to put her in with me.

We did that regularly until she was 8 months old then she just seemed to stop wanting it.

She slept in a cot in our room until she was 18 months old.

These days I find any excuse to try to bring her into bed with us, I just adore it.