We started having similar issues with our DS1 around the same age - including day sleeps - which made it (and occassionally stills does) hard when I have a now almost 11month old to look after while trying to put DS1 to sleep (cause they are often on opposite sleep times).

With DS1 during the day sleep and putting down to sleep at night I would read a book - but I sit a the bottom of his bed...sometimes he'll drift off during the book, if not I give him a kiss and say close your eyes and go to sleep and I would walk out. If he grumbled I would sit beside the bed, then get up, more grumble I would stand at the door (telling him I'm right here), eventually I'd close the door and wait - if I heard him getting up or grumbling - open the door slightly - letting him know I'm not far away. I would also have to put him back into bed a few times when he got up....I would lay him down, do the kiss, close eyes and tell him to sleep a couple of times, but then if it continued just lay him and walk out (sometimes he would begin to cry, but by the time I closed the door he would stop). Eventually he got the idea and most days/evenings he is pretty good and goes down ok (we still have challenging days though....especially if overtired).

As for night and early morning wake ups...DS1 did that too. If it was/is after 4am - if he comes I usually just let him stay in our room (DH leaves for work around then anyway...so I don't mind having a snuggle with my DS then). If its before then though, I just put him back in his bed and keep telling him to go back to sleep - it can sometimes take 20mins or so and it is sooo tempting to lay next to him, but I don't. I just sit at the end or on the side and eventually he stays and drifts back off.

I'm not sure if any of that will help you, but just know you are not alone. It seems to be a common thing around that age by the look of it. And hopefully you'll work out something that works for you's.