At the end of my rope with night sleeps... please help me...

[Marlene]

Come to think of it, I think I know what helped Nina sleep better. We moved her into a different bedroom at around 8 months, and that's when she started sleeping through. Dunno if it was a coincidence or not though.
Can you do that at your place?

Maybe give that a try Leasha. I moved Jack into his own room at 6 months but it hasnt made any difference. No better....no worse. But anything is worth a try, you never know it could work for you.
Just remember, when you are sitting there in tears in the middle of the night...there are plenty of us doing the exact same thing, you are not alone. {{hugs}}

[jackrose]

Hi Leasha,

Another one here to join you, spring angel and sammiejane!
DD began to wake more often at about 6 months although at its worst she was waking up to every HALF HOUR!!!!!!!! I tried so many things, lots of things which were suggested here. I remained as calm as I could based on the advice that 'this too shall pass', however when 5 months later things were still bad... yes 5 months... and I was quite literally loosing it (I hear you) I honestly felt I cannot make it through the next night let alone wait till it passes.
I ended up at a sleep school, a day stay program. The advice and support was a godsend, I didn't feel that I had to give up on my gentle parenting approach and what we came away with made our home a much much happier one. (The relationship between DH and I was really suffering also as I needed help and support and he just didn't get it. Plus, the stress of sleeplessness really does cause friction in the household)

I told DH that he has to get up for one full night with her on the weekends (no BF overnight anymore - that stopped about a month ago, mainly cos i stopped offering and she didnt look for it) and he has reluctantly agreed.
Yes he is very tired from work, but i told him that MJ is his child too and if he doesnt play a part in her upbringing, there is no point him being around....

You go girl!!! I really think that is such a necessary thing to do! I am very impressed. I was never able to get my DH to understand this one and it caused so much tension between us. Although DH was not really supportive at home and at night, I made him come to the sleep school with me so I felt we were working together in a united effort and it was a godsend. He learned what I learned and understood much more about what I was going though.

So I guess what my advice is consider that sleep school is not for everyone, but you should try to do what ever you can to get help and support when you are feeling so frustrated and out of control with sleep issues. I left it way to long hoping that something would give and if I had my time again, I would have been much more proactive much earlier.

ATB!

[krisp]

I can't really offer any suggestions as I too have a house of non sleepers! My DS was 17months when he slept through and we have just this week (Friday night) started DD on a no overnight feed regime -and she is almost 15months old!
It's tough and I don't have the answer or I would have used it with DD. I've been to sleep school with DS and had a sleep consultant come to the house so I know what supposedly "works" but still no success with DD.
There is 20 months between my 2 so I've had 3 months of sleep in almost 3 years so I hear ya....

I suppose you are doing the sleep routine stuff - same dinner time, same bath time, quiet play, feed and then bed? The only thing that kind of works here is sleep "cues", ie, we sing the same song before night bed time each night, we say the same thing - Mummy/Daddy loves you, time for sleep". They do learn to associate the cue with sleep, but like you my bubs had no trouble going to sleep the issue is staying alseep.
Hang in there, it's damn hard but know that eventually it will stop and Jazz will sleep.

[Eugenia]

Hi Leasha, I don't know if you're still interested in sleep schools but here's the little that I know. There is one somewhere in the northside that does stays of a few days and there is also another one just outside Ipswich or maybe Beenleigh. Now one of them is supposed to be very good with regards to the whole gentle parenting approach to sleeping, ie no CC, but I'm not sure which one it is! Sorry. Though I do think it is the northside one which would be more convenient for you anyway. Man, I don't think I'm being much help here. There is also a sleep clinic at the Mater children's hospital but I think it is for children with actual physical sleep problems. It's worthwhile talking to your GP about it if you CHN won't do anything, I know my sister talked to one when she was going through a similar stage as you and they asked for a referral from a GP anyway.

[*charmalea*]

DS woke up to 4 times a night up untill 12 mths ! we just heated up a bottle and he went back to sleep !!! its not "the right thing " to do but it worked for us and he slept a bit better , i found we was always hungry and a comfort thing ..

DD wakes 2 or 3 times a night for a feed !!

i went to the sleep school and to be honest its all about controlled comforting there , so the nurse was just saving you the trip and it was the most boring week in my life !!!

a lovely BB lady told me the name of a website and it worked well , google "sleep and settle" dcdau and give that a go maybe ...

it suck being woken , i am a zombie today DD woke at 10:50 pm and every 3 hrly , usunally she wakes about 2 am ... and then is up and down till when ever she decides to really sleep ..

i had to return to wrapping her .. over the last few days its been a big improvement !!

:hugs:

try find a mummy that isnt tired .. comes with the territory

[BekZ]

I would seek out a sleep school hon. They will teach you about sleep patterns and explain when to night and when to encourage self settling. Do you have the child health line number? I am not sure if I can post it but I will pm it to you. If not it is in the contacts of your red book you would have been given when bub was born.

DD2 was a constant night waker and she did not sleep through till 9months old, but by 6 months we started teaching her to self settle. However at 9 months her waking was only for a feed and then straight back to sleep. Yes I we did let her cry for a bit (not long and not until she was screaming). I stopped talking to her and just kept going back into the room to put her down. I did not put the light on and I did not make eye contact. Actually this worked best when DH did it...So I would tell your partner that her part of parenting is much needed at this time and you need her help...Just because she doesn't feed doesn't mean she can't parent iykwim.

HTH's you....btw this process worked for within a week.

[Pink+blue]

my sister was in a simular situation when her daughter was younger & she went to the Riverton family centre (now called Ellen Barron Family Centre) im pretty sure its in chermside or near there but it maybe worth a try

[thepixie]

Leash I can't offer anything except lots of s

[SamiH]

Hi

you say you have been co-sleeping etc - is there a chance that when she is waking you are not able to give her a chance to self settle back to sleep - because of worried about Shel waking etc - perhaps if you did try another room you wouldn't hear the grizzles as much and might get more sleep - might take her half an hour to work up to a cry OR she might just go back to sleep???

Just a suggestion - I dont wanna be bombarded from cosleepers please.

[jackrose]

you say you have been co-sleeping etc - is there a chance that when she is waking you are not able to give her a chance to self settle back to sleep - because of worried about Shel waking etc - perhaps if you did try another room you wouldn't hear the grizzles as much and might get more sleep - might take her half an hour to work up to a cry OR she might just go back to sleep???

Yessss Yessss Yesss!

Thanks for reminding me Sami H!! This was exactly what was behind my DD's sleep issues in the end... breast attachment and breast association with sleeping as a result of co-sleeping. I loved cosleeping and it worked a treat for us up to the 6 month mark. I highly recommend it and will do it for any (Hopeful) subsequent pregnancies.

I found that at 6-11 months DD needed to learn how to resettle back to sleep without a breast in her mouth and the close proximity to me was making this really tricky.

Once we established her new bed in another room and with the help of the sleep school support we were off and racing (or sleeping!) Straight through 7-7 within a week.

No barrage of abuse Sami, Kudos for throwing it out there!! Although some babies happily co-sleep through this stage... for some it is just not the answer.

[Jennifer13]

Comforted sleeping does not have to mean co-sleeping, as some of the others have said. It just means not going down the controlled crying, etc, path. I don't know if sleep school would help, I would ask your CHN why she doesn't like it. If they practice controlled crying, it's not going to help you or Jazz, Leasha.

I don't know what will help her sleep better at night, but I think you should definitely be napping more during the day! If Shel doesn't like being woken at night, or having a crabby partner, then perhaps she wouldn't mind a less-than-perfectly-tidy house instead? When Jazz is having a nap in the afternoon, go to sleep yourself. Treat yourself the way you did when she was a newborn (and waking just as frequently). If you get more rest and aren't at the end of your rope, maybe you will come up with a solution to Jazz's wakefulness yourself. Or maybe you'll just get through it without losing your mind.