Sammy, you hear it all the time that if you feed a baby to sleep they will always need it. Personally I think it's a load of rubbish. I fed both my boys to sleep at that age, and both stopped wanting a feed before bed all by themselves. DS1 was 14 months when he stopped having a feed before bed, but he was not feeding to sleep long before then. DS2 stopped having a feed before bed at around 12 months, and also stopped feeding to sleep a few months before then. And this was all infant led!

As for when you are not there, I never found that to be a problem either. When you are there, she will want the usual routine. But when you are not there with your milk smell, she should be fine. My boys were able to fall asleep without me if I wasn't there, but if I was there they would want their feed. I worried terribly the couple of times that they were put to bed while I was out, but I needn't have. Each time the DS in question feel asleep easily with no fuss after a drink of EBM.