I have to ask.

because, I had Tresillian around and the nurse said, you HAVE to let your baby cry or he will never learn to self settle. I don't want to let my bub cry, he's only 4 and half months.

but, he is very heavy (8.7kgs) and currently the only way I can get him to sleep is to rock him in my arms. argggggggggh my back is killing me.

i have the nocry sleep solutions book, and I am trying a few of the suggestions in it but I don't have a full plan yet.

I am having trouble with the graduated transitioning to cot ideas, because when bub's head hits the cot, he cries. he won't be consoled in cot with rocking or patting or singing. I can put him down happy but awake and leave him there till he grizzles, once I pick him up and calm him down, though, he seems to go back to "cot is evil" mode.

I can keep trying. but the Tresillian advice has knocked my confidence right on the head. I feel like a failure as a mum. Why bother if, as they say, he won't learn to sleep unless I let him cry?

i really just need some confidence boosting (and extra suggestions if you have them) to give me the energy to keep going with this. it's not easy going against the advice of "experts" when you are getting desperate!