Im so with you on this, i have been out twice in 19 months, but it doesnt bother me. i meet friends in the day etc and thats easy. Sometimes it can take hours to get DD to sleep so i just tend to find it easier and less stressfull for all if i dont plan to go out at night. I have no idea what im going to do on my wedding day in august.
People judge and shake thier heads and then in the same breath comment on how chilled out and confident she is.....i wish others would see the link between her knowing that im always there for her 100% and her outgoing confident personality.
I wouldnt trust anyone else to put her to sleep (apart from DH, although he never has im sure if he HAD to hed be fine) i dont know anyone else who shares the same ideas as me an i can imagine that the might just give up after half an hour and leave her to cry.....id be devistated!!!!!!!
It is hard but at the end of the day you know your doing the best for your bub and you can walk around with a lovely smug look on your face...who cares if others think your crazy! TBH my opinion on CCing is probably the same as others opinions of my comforted sleeping....someone will always think the other is crazy!!
I rarely go out at night either, I'm like Astrid, it doesn't bother me too much since I only have to do it for such a short amount of time. If I go out, I prefer to go out during the day anyway. My SIL thinks we're crazy, but we make this choice to be gentle parents for us and Jazz, not SIL, so she can think what she wants. It annoys me to have to explain it each time, but i don't let it bother me too much, or make me not want to comfort Jazz to sleep.
A was fed to sleep until about 24 months. C is 10 months and still fed & walked to sleep every night. I just wear babe in a sling/carrier and things go fine while we're out, or when we have people over.
A used to just feed to sleep, so I could sit with him in the sling and he'd just fall asleep. C does need walking as well as feeding, but I tend to just pace around the room, or ask if anyone wants to take a walk with me.
They've always gone out with us at night and so are used to it. Though they are able to sleep through anything once they've dropped off, which is a definite advantage!
I'm like sneaky sparkle - the odd times I have have been out where I've needed to take DD with me and not been at someone's house, I've given her as close to her routine as she's used to wherever we are. Recently that meant dinner on a plane, BF once landed and asleep in the car on the way home (2 hour drive from airport).
Other times where I have been out to other's homes, it's meant stealing other people's bath and a quiet bedroom and giving DD as much of her bedtime routine as possible and then cuddles/feeds to sleep even if it's meant I've missed a course in dinner etc.
More recently, we've been able to gently start DH trying to put my DD to bed at night. She no longer feeds to sleep but has cuddled to sleep for quite a while now. We tried numerous times to see if she would let DH go through her bedtime routine with her without me. It didn't work quite a number of times we tried over several months and I had to rescue her as she would get very upset if I wasn't there (she had lots of separation anxiety generally, not just at night from about 8 -12 months). Now that she is forming a stronger and stronger bond with her Daddy (in the last few months in particular) she is happy to trust him to look after her at night time, is not anxious when I am not there. So now we take every second night alternating to do her bedtime routine and cuddle her to sleep. She loves it. And this also means that I can now comfortably leave the house for an evening out and know that everything is okay, including being able to leave before her bedtime.
Is it possible to start introducing your DH into the bedtime routine gently over time? We did that with DH doing more of bath time and more reading books before bath, and as this was happening, my DD stopped feeding to sleep so we changed to cuddling to sleep. This then gave the flexibility to have DH get more involved again, slowly as she became ready.
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks