It's great to hear of a success story, thank you!
It seems there are a few of us out there at the moment going through sleep problems.
Although I can't actually see the light at the end of the tunnel at the moment, your story has made me realise, there is a light and one day I will see it
Thanks for posting a great success story! I am one that is getting pressure (even from DH) to let Jack "cry it out" but I refuse too, so glad to see "comforting" work for you.
oh how lovely to read a positive story like this, thanks for sharing!
What did you do to extract yourself from your bubs sleep association, out of interest? I'm tossing up whether to do that or not, I'm really just wondering if I have the patience and committment right now. It seems easier just to stay doing what we are doing IYKWIM.
The reason i posted my story was to give others a bit of light at the end of that long tunnel. Once peoples babies sleep well you don't hear much about them anymore, just all the horror stories! So i am glad it has encouraged at least a couple of people.
Rah- Basically what i did was deal with one thing at a time. So, to stop the feeding to sleep, i would pull her off and just rock her. If she was upset i'd put her back on. I certainly didn't put her back on at the first cry because often shed let out a protest squark and then settle. But if she was upset and wouldn't be comforted by a cuddle and rocking i'd put her back on. I would do this a few times until i felt i didn't want to persist as it was getting hard, then i would just feed her to sleep. The next time i'd do it all over again until it got to the point where i could rock her to sleep.
Once we were at this point i worked on putting her down a little bit awake and rubbing her tummy or patting her until she fell asleep. Same thing again, if she got upset i'd pick her up and cuddle her until she settled then try again. If it wasn't working i just rocked her to sleep and then put her down.
Like i said, she would let out a little cry, but not an upset one. I was happy for her to have a grizzle but i stayed with her and alwaysh comforted her if she got upset.
This is what worked for me, but as you all know, every baby is different so you might need to things a bit differently.
If any of this sounds like a good idea I really recommend reading 'no cry sleep solutions'. I only read it once, but it gave me confidence to know i was doing the right thing. And the most important thing is if you are getting somewhere and then have a bad night and have to revert to old methods such as feeding to sleep, IT DOESN'T MATTER. You havn't ruined everything, just keep going the next time.
Best of luck to everyone.
Out of curiosity, do you have consistent sleep times and pre-bed routines? I've just been reading 'no cry sleep solutions' and it seems that a fairly key message is consistency of routine.
I really want to try to gently guide Euan to self-settling (presently he is either fed or rocked in a pram to sleep, he will occasionally self settle at night if he wakes but not often), and to adopting an earlier bedtime (currently it is 11:00pm at the earliest, he has always been a nightowl).
The only problem that I have is that it is almost impossible for us to have a proper night routine because my partner works until 6:30 three nights of the week, and until 8:30 the other two nights. Because he doesn't drive I am taxi driver, and so we are not home until after 7:00 or 9:00, making a consistent early bedtime tricky.
Must be hard trying to organise everything and be the taxi too! Hats off to you suse.
Yes we have a bedtime routine. Food, nappy off, bath, quiet play, books, cuddle, bed.
If we are in a hurry, it is food, bath, books and cuddle, bed. i try and do this even if it is late. We have skipped the bath a few times and she was ok.
I think it is important to do those wind down things, even if you get home late, maybe you could just have a book, cuddle, bed routine. We all do the best we can with what we've got. If all you can do is a quiet story in his room with the lights dimmed, then that is great. As long as he associated the activities with sleep then it should help in the long run.
When Lu woke in the night, for a long time she needed a reassuring pat to go back to sleep, slowly she started to wake and self settle without crying out, they do get there, slowly but surely! Its great if DH can help with this, i found if i went in she wanted a feed but she settled much better for him. He was a great help during this time.
Just had a massive day at the expo, a bit tired! hope i am being coherrent!
Wow I'm feeeling a bit inspired.... I might have to give that book another look. i flicked through once and thought it seemed like too much hard work (I think it was the sleep diary that put me off).
I love stories like this! It shows it can be done!
I too never let Charlie cry, and I do the bedtime routine religiously, even now. And Charlie learned to self-settle on his own at 11 months, and learned sleep all night too, without us ever having to 'let him cry it out'.
A no-crying sleep solution works. More and more mothers are finding that out every day.
Wow this thread is renewing my energy and hope levels I think it is me that is a bit inconsistent with approach because 50% of the time I adore helping DS off to sleep and 50% of the time I find it impractical - and in thinking about a #2, I don't know how I'd do both! It's been a good gift while we've had it though, but as he gets older, I'd like him to do it on his own.
So this is hopeful! Thanks.
I don't feed him to sleep, but he is obsessed with having one arm around my neck, playing with my hair. Tonight I gave it a go (withdrawing myself) and even though his eyes were shut and he was pretty much asleep he started waving his hands, searching all over the place to find me. I was so annoyed that it WOKE him up. Is this what to expect? A realllyyy long drawn out going to sleep process until it changes?
*sigh*
I need to prepare myself to be more patient at that rate.
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(I think it was the sleep diary that put me off).
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