Hun, I know I am coming in late here, but just remember that what you are doing is going to take some time and helping DD change her habits is hard work. But, if you stick with it, it will be worth it in the long run.

When I was following this book, the one thing that got my through was, when I hit a wall like you are at now, I just went back a step (for me that was boob feeding to sleep) and next time went back to the routine. I know that can make it take longer, but, it does work. I would pat and cuddle DS, but eventually would give in with the boob, but made sure to stop his feed just before he fell asleep then start the patting again. It does work. I know it doesn't feel like it now, but you can do this.