I feel for you. We had sleep issues with DD1. Its so hard the first few days but you prolly need to give it 3 days to see an improvement. Hope she settles for you.
Don't be so hard on yourself It takes time to see an improvement and sometimes it is a two steps forward and one step back situation. My DS has never slept through (not what you want to hear ) but he has made some huge improvements with the NCSS changes. He even tells me what comes next in the routine There are days when we go backwards and we just start with the basics or go back to the *bad habit* in order for him to get to sleep because sleep deprivation makes it all soooooo much harder.
DD is difficult at the moment. She is having (roughly) 2 naps per day if they are decent or 3 if they are one hour ones. The afternoon is tough because she NEEDS a sleep around 5pm, otherwise she has been up for 4-5 hours by bedtime and that is far too long. She then gets overtired and it takes forever to get her to sleep and to stay asleep. I am also finding that she is waking after the first sleep cycle at night too so I have to go in to her before she wakes up to try to resettle her as she stirs, rather than have her up for another hour or two.
You are doing great. Allow yourself to make adjustments. Give yourself permission to change one little thing at a time rather than everything at once if you think that might help / make it easier to stick to / be less stressful.
With DS, we decided to concentrate on getting the routine sorted before moving onto the other sleep issues and concentrate on his tired signs for setting a bedtime. Amazingly, this routine has also seen a big improvement in his sleeping too. Not every day (I wish!!) but much better than before. Because DD is also in the same routine, she is now rubbing her eyes and is ready for sleep after the bath A no effort outcome!! We still need to sort out the self settling but it will come. Eventually!!
Thanks so much everyone. Well after I wrote that last post she gave up and went down easily on the next try so was in bed by 9.30pm again. It just seems every night we try for ages and it wakes her up more so then we have to have a break where she's awake for 1/2hr until she gets tired again and we try again. I hope this is ok and she's not just going to get used to doing that.
We had a pretty similar night to the night before after she finally went down. Woke up 2.5hrs later and ended up in bed with us for the rest of the night just bc we kept falling asleep while she was feeding. Really have to try and stay awake!
One positive thing I can say is that for the last month she hasn't actually gone back to sleep feeding like she used to and we have been up in the night rocking sometimes for hours at a time BUT the last 2 nights we haven't had to get out of bed at all!! Not sure if it's related but even if she hasn't been sleeping long b/w wake-ups I am a lot more rested for not having to get out of bed!
And for the last 4 nights I have sometimes heard her wake in the night (and actually wake right up) sometimes if she's next to me even and be kicking around and rolling everywhere and then all of a sudden just roll towards me cuddle up and go to sleep. Now this is bloody amazing. She has NEVER put herself back to sleep! I don't know why she's started this though. Maybe it's the cosleeping? We've only started doing that more regularly in the last couple of weeks as she's had a cold and was miserable and we found she slept better with me. I don't really want to keep cosleeping though bc there's not enough room and DH ends up getting kicked out. I don't know how one little baby can take up so much room!! I like her to start the night in her own cot (which is right next to our bed anyway) bc I like the time to snuggle and talk with DH nd I also don't want to have to go to bed at the same time as her every night! I do enjoy the early morning cuddles though. Maybe tonight I'll sit up and feed her for the first wake-up and put her back in her cot then which means I'll be awake more but then on the next wake-up she can stay in bed with me so I get more sleep. Then gradually as she gets better I can put her back in bed for more and more sleeps iykwim.
Thanks so much everyone for all your support! When I was fed up last night and came and read your response it got me back on track and ready to start again. Exactly what I needed
Michelle- That's what we did too! We actually started the bedtime routine a couple of weeks ago bc we thought it would be better to get her used to it so she knew when sleep was coming and had a better idea of what we wanted her to do iykwim? And actually since we started it she has been easier to get to sleep at night (just not put down!) but now it's harder again bc we're trying to get rid of the rocking, lol.
Yay! Progress! Make sure you celebrate the successes - I often get stuck on the bits that didn't work rather than what DID.... You will be amazed how much easier it is when you have had a bit more sleep. You all deserve a treat today - do something nice for yourselves. Great job Mum!
PS -OT but I have to mention I love your quote, it has helped me no end when I feel like the mess here is engulfing me. I often get caught up in cleaning and making things ordered to my own detriment. Thanks. x
Heaven, good for you! And it will take time. And even when it does take time, there'll be times when she's teething and will be up all night again, but *that's okay* because you've given her some tools to get herself back on track again.
Are you breastfeeding? I am asking because you say in your plan that babies at five months old should be able to sleep through the night without feeding. That may be so for some babies, but not so for others, particularly breastfed babies, and night feeding is often necessary for some babies for many, many months. The ideal I guess is that they wake up when they are hungry and go straight back to sleep again. Insisting on sleeping through without a breastfeed might jeopardise your milk supply, particularly when growth spurts are hitting.
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It takes time to see an improvement and sometimes it is a two steps forward and one step back situation. My DS has never slept through (not what you want to hear
) but he has made some huge improvements with the NCSS changes. He even tells me what comes next in the routine
There are days when we go backwards and we just start with the basics or go back to the *bad habit* in order for him to get to sleep because sleep deprivation makes it all soooooo much harder.
A no effort outcome!! We still need to sort out the self settling but it will come. Eventually!!
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