Thought I better update. We are doing well!! Haven't done anything differently except give up, pmsl.

DD now has 2 day sleeps and lets me put her down for them. She goes to sleep A LOT easier day and night. Has been waking 3 times a night but going straight back to sleep thank God. Out of the last 5 nights, 3 of them she has only woken twice!! Miracle, lol. She is now sleeping in until 6am (instead of 5-5.30am). She sleeps more time in her cot than with us! She only sleeps with us if I accidentally fall asleep feeding or she is having a bad night and won't go in her bed which is maybe part of the night 1 night a week. She never used to go into her cot after about 3am but now she does and we have been waking up to her playing in her cot and smiling at us, beautiful. Also, when she wakes in the night she feeds and seems to be not quite asleep when we put her back in her cot and will roll around and get comfy and stay asleep!!!!!!!! Previously she had to be absolutely dead asleep and even then it only worked 1/2 the time.
Sometimes when she wakes we can even just say 'shhhh shhhh' and she goes back to sleep.
She has always hated the car and will never sleep in there but last week I was driving home with her and she cried for about 30secs and then was suspiciously quiet. When I got home SHE WAS ASLEEP!!!!!!! She has never ever ever put herself to sleep before!! So that was a major breakthrough.

So, even though we are still waking a lot at night I can see lots of improvement. We're all much happier and I don't actually feel too tired most of the time!!

I'm feeling very proud of us atm. We stuck to our gentle techniques and it is finally paying off. She is learning to sleep better and she feels safe and loved Thankyou everyone for all your support and keeping me sane!!!!