Pinky Mckay

[nox]

Rainforest -- Piky told me that 10-15 mo is one of the hardest parts. It is because teeth are coming thru thick nad fast as well as the molars which are hell. Also the whole wanting to talk and walk thing keeps them more stressed/alert especially if you are blessed with an extra alert and sensitive soul as I am. Her view is to do what you can to cope. Try to get some early nights as you can and stock up on vitamins. She suggests giving naps to bubs as you can -- don't worry about processes etc -- if he sleeps if you go in the car, go in the car, feed to sleep whenever you need, etc. Some of this just doesn't work for me so I found that hard to take. She was all for the fact that I have engaged a babysitter to help when I have to work from home and she puts him to nap. Not quite a promise, but she did say that things will most likely settle down for themselves without her help. I really hope it's true!!!! I have just over 3 more months -- so fingers crossed!! haha

It is true that being more focused helps. But also due acknowledgment to the fact that no matter how attached you are, these things will still stress you out and make you frustrated if not angry. I wore my baby exclusively and believed he should 'never tough the ground', I co-slept for a long time and still do and am dedicated to him and extremely aware of him. Yet still, I am at some stages, well and truly over it. I find that to allow myself not NOT feel bad for feeling bad has helped.

Tobily-- thank you for the tips. You are right, I am trying most of that and I think that as you say, the acceptance that this is part of life and will soon pass will help us out a lot. We are talking about it even now -- although we shoudl be tryiong to catch up on some sleep!!!

[Ginger]

thanks for that nox, and you too tobily
makes me feel a lot better about where we're at, at the moment.
we co-sleep everynight and feed to sleep a lot.
i guess i start to feel bad about it all when i hear about friends' babies who sleep from 7pm-7am everynight.

[krisp]

We've tried co-cleeping but all Paisley does is curl her fingers in my hair and pull it. She thinks it's party time and won't sleep. I still haven't heard from Pinky - I spoke to her Husband 4 or 5 days ago and he said he would get to her to return my call that same night. I guess she must be very busy, perhaps too busy to help us. I'm at the point now where I'm thinking of going to the Mother-Baby-Unit at Masada Private Hospital to see if they can help. I understand that she is going through a time of development as she's just about to crawl and I know that baby's sleep when they are ready. I suppose my main fear is that I will get sick again from being run down from only getting 4 or 5 hours sleep a night (and broken at that!). It's been 5 years this year since my breast cancer and I don't want to ever go back to that dark place. I'm so confused as to what to do...

[Astrid]

thanks for that nox, and you too tobily
makes me feel a lot better about where we're at, at the moment.
we co-sleep everynight and feed to sleep a lot.
i guess i start to feel bad about it all when i hear about friends' babies who sleep from 7pm-7am everynight.

Don't feel bad about the 7 to 7. I was talking to a mum of 7 and she used to always be told off by a friend of hers whose baby "slept 7 till 7". She found out that the 7 to 7 meant that bubs was in the room all that time regardless of whether it was a asleep or not. If the bubs cried, they just left it as it was meant to be sleeping Often what we hear is not reality.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

I always had the attitude that I wouldn't be getting sleep with a baby! We can live off supermarket food for a bit, we don't need to vacuum every day, we just need to get along. That worked for about a year, then I got narky with DS not sleeping because he COULD and did every 7-8 weeks or so just once, he just wouldn't all the time!

We took DS to the homeopath and he slept through - I mean went from being up for hours a few times a night and getting in total maybe 6 hours sleep a night to sleeping for 11 hours straight with no wake-ups - from the third tablet we gave him. That was about at 15m but I can't see such a sudden transformation happening without those tablets.

OK so he's still not the world's best sleeper, but the wake-ups are unusual rather than normal now. He may wake up as we're going to bed, he may wake up at 6.30 - who knows?

[nox]

Kris-- I really hear you about your desperation now. You have to do what works for you. That is the most important. As you know there are wait lists and you need a referral. Why not go to your gp for the refferal and take that opportunity to chat about options and make sure there is no medical problem like ear infections. While you wait call Pinky again and look into homeopathy or an osteopath. Read up on other strategies to cope for your own sake--- hire a sitter for a few hours in the day so you can sleep etc.
Also whilebi have friends who have done Masada, have a look at o'connell centre abdcqueen Elizabeth. I also found that at your local maternal health centre there are usually a sleep specialist. I usedine and she was considerate of my wishes and supportive. The nurse can also help you find solutions to cope.
I am reading books online or checking out from the library. Sometimes these simple actions help us feel more in control of our lives and enable us to see our situation in a different light. You are doing well and it will pass.
Please take care.

Having been reminded about homeopathy I'm going to think about that! Also that totally reminded me about my osteo who was helpful in ds's early days.
try to find some time for yourself. It really really helps.