help! i can't take my own body seriously!!

[carrie189]

hi everyone (sorry if this ends up being too long! but PLEASE read it.. i could really do with some feedback..)

i posted another thread a few days ago titled "a little concerned.. looking for advice". this is a lead on from that but i decided to put it in a new thread because the problem this time is a bit different.

originally i was concerned because i was getting sharp bb pains which is really unusual for me, even when AF is due. but that has eased a little- bb are still sensitive but not painful anymore thank god. at that point in time AF still wasn't due for a few days.

well AF is officially late now. i'm waiting until Monday to make any doctor's appointments or anything just incase, because she's showed up a day or two late before. but she was due on the 5th and still no sign of her yet. haven't done a HPT yet mainly because if it's a BFN i'll be disappointed but still not 100% convinced that it's not a false neg.

i've had nausea over the past 2 or 3 days and it's still coming and going and i'm feeling very bloated. also i've realised that i've been suffering from major tiredness without even connecting it to maybe being pregnant! over the last 2 weeks i have slept till after midday almost every day (i'm studying, but am on a break at the moment). i never connected the two, just figured i must be staying up too late or something!

it's been about 4 or 5 days that i've had absolutely no interest in BD.. and i know this is going to sound very bad but that's unusual for me.. it's not like i'm up for it any old time of the day or night or anything like that, but i don't usually feel like the thought of it is so unappealing.

i've been experiencing cramping different to AF cramping over the last couple days in odd places, (for example, right now i've got cramping on the right side of my abdomen), and it's kind of played in with the nausea. not to mention i've been getting indigestion regularly.because of the bloating, it's really been feeling like AF is around the corner, just taking her time. i've also have had a lot of EWCM lately which is unusual for me around the time AF is due (sorry for tmi). i only usually get EWCM around O time.

really not sure what's going on. at the moment, i'm just feeling like it's all in my head because whenever i get myself worked up and excited thinking i might be pregnant, i end up getting a BFN on the HPT. i know i should just go buy myself a HPT and get it over with since i haven't even tested yet but i know that if it's a BFN and the "symptoms" don't go away, it won't ease my mind at all. on the other hand if it's a BFP there will be the huge mix of emotions- i'll be overjoyed because a baby is always a wonderful thing and DP and i definitely want to have children but it will be stressful as well as i'm still living at home (with my mum) while attending university so this is a little ahead of schedule. DP and i weren't planning on moving in together until we'd finished our degrees- so we're not very well prepared. i know it sounds terrible.
so in light of all that, i still haven't decided which way i want that HPT to go!

i'm just feeling really overwhelmed and confused at the moment. hence the title of this post- i really don't feel like i can take my body seriously because i keep wondering if it's all in my head because i THINK i'm pregnant. but even before i was thinking about it much, i was getting some of these symptoms. my mum got sick even before she found out she was pregnant and she had difficult pregnancies with me and my brother, i've taken after her when it comes to AF tendencies etc so i'm guessing that when i am pregnant, i'll probably feel the effects earlier than expected.

anyway- does anybody have any feedback on this? have any of you experienced the same symptoms? am i stupid to not really want to do a HPT yet? i'd LOVE to hear from some of you- even if it's just a "hang in there".

thanks girls.xx