How Does One Ignore The Ticking of The Clock?

[Natalia]

The hassle with Centerlink is primarily because my current job is casual... and even though some weeks that can mean like, 22 hours or more, some weeks it means nothing... which according to Centerlink, puts me in the category of still being reliant on them... and yeah, that's true.

If I go study full time, I will actually get LESS money from Centerlink than I am now, which I can in no way afford, specially not with transport to and from uni, rising petrol costs and cost of textbooks!!!! They also wouldn't give me rent assistance for my share of the rent I pay, which I couldn't do without.

So, I go part time. But then, Centerlink tells me "if you're not studying full time, then that has nothing to do with us, you do that on your own time, you still have to come in here and fulfill every one of our obligations" which means going on a 35 minute trip to the office every fortnight to hand in forms, go to Assisted Job Search appointments, look for 9 jobs a fortnight, do whatever shifts I have at work, and also do Work for the Dole... and then my study, which is done in "my own time". I actually spend hours and hours a week, doing all the stuff for Centerlink, but if I go fulltime study, my money from them drops by about $75 or so they worked out, which is much too much to lose. Even cheap Coles brand food is getting expensive.

So long and dreary.

Everyone here keeps telling me to go see a counsellor. I've been to see various ones on a couple of occasions... They can be so awfully annoying... I mean, you tell them about how your best friend one night while you were drunk practically raped you and you woke up to find him on top of you going hell for leather, and you're crying your eyes out and the doc says "now how do you feel about that?"
You just wanna scream "How the f**k do you THINK I feel you loser???"

I am totally not going to be like that when I am counselling.

[Jennifer13]

Hi Natalia

It was really hard for me to justify going back to uni to study when I was on my own and facing the same types of financial issues you mention. In the end I decided to do my degree externally (mostly by correspondence) through UNE so that I could continue to work. Totally sucks that we don't get more support to study and further our education and then our career.

I think if you decide what is important and have a goal that you want to achieve badly enough it sounds like you'll have the strength to see it through. You've come through so much already that the hurdles you now face sound like something within your abilities.

Good luck in making a choice and I hope things fall into place for you. As for counselling, I guess it's a matter of finding someone that 'fits', not every counsellor is going to work out, especially when you have really tough issues, as it sounds you do. I'm glad it gives you something to aim for though, we certainly need great counsellors out there!

[SallyJ]

Have you looked into Austudy? The independent rate is better than Centrelink and you can still work a minimal number of hours, but you get to study full time. Talk to the student centre at uni, they will have advice for you on the best thing to do. You don't want to miss this opportunity.

As Jennifer13 said, there are lots of counsellors out there, they have different styles, not all of them suit everybody.

[Baby Angels]

I m going to suggest something and Its your life if you want to listen then listen if you dont then its your call.

Why are you searching everywhere for love. Searching in a partner, Searching in a child, wanting to be loved and felt appreciated would by my answer. Sorry for my directness but I read all of your posts and I read someone crying for affection and attention.

I was single after seperating with my Husband of 10 years. I didnt know who I was as a single person so I jumped straight into another relationship....... HUGE error..... But I learnt something very quickly.........

You must love yourself completely and without any reservation before you can ever give yourself fully to another person, including a child.

My suggestion to you would be, firstly you are only 25. There are plenty of women on here in there late 30s and early 40s..... I m one of them.... who are now pregnant or TTC. You say you have a casual Job and a course placement. Focus on them, focus on you. Strengthen yourself. Find your own place, have your own home. Start your own life. Stop searching for someone elses affection and start looking inside yourself and finding it from within.

Now you can read this post and think about it or you can read it and get cranky and peeved at me. Like I said...... Its your life.... Its your call.

[Muppity]

Natalia

Did the Centrelink staff explain the income bank to you? When you are studying full time you can earn a certain amount of money each week before your benefit is decreased. It was orginially set up so people could get jobs over the long Christmas break without their benefits being affected but you can earn that money at any time during the year.

In the end if you want to be a counsellor or psychologist or whatever then you have to decide if you are willing to make the sacrifices that you have to to get where you want to. You can live off a centrelink benefit. They are specifically designed so that you can survive on them but there isn't much left over. You just have to put in some coping mechanisms.

Here is what got my through uni the first time:
* You don't need most text books as they can be borrowed from libraries.
* All the stationery you need is a spiral bound book a couple of pens, a ream of A4 printing paper and a flash drive. Unis provide computer facilities so you can use them to type of your notes and do all your essays etc. Often at their orientation days they give away stationery so stock up then (who cares if it has logos on it if it is for free)
* Make sure that you have all the right student cards etc so that transport is cheaper and visit the student union office to find out what other places offer discounts to student card holders.
* Many lectures are taped so if you only have one on one day you can listen to the tape on another day and save on a whole day of transport costs.
*Put in a vegetable garden and grow some of your own foods, prepare your own foods rather than buying prepackaged.
*If you are going to be at uni for lunch take it with you. A sandwich costs next to nothing to make at home but buying it will generally cost you $5 or more. And carry a water bottle with you so you aren't tempted to buy drinks.
* Join clubs at uni that provide free social activities or entertainment.
*Find out what day things are cheaper at the markets (for me it was Sunday afternoon) as you can buy heaps of fresh food for much cheaper as it is easier for the stall holders to sell it than pack it back up.
* Seeings as you know your landlord negotiate doing extra around the house for a drop in rent or them covering utilities.
* Ask at the student union about financial assistance. Often there are scholarships and financial assistance packages funded by the uni/government/charities that aren't advertised and so people don't know unless they ask.

Can I suggest that you sign up with lifeline? They provide full training for you to become a telephone counsellor and then you may be able to decide if this is really what you want to be doing. It costs money to do the course but if you are in receipt of benefits yourself you get it cheaper and it is a good way to see what counselling is really about and would be a valuable tool for your studies.

Please see this as an opportunity for personal growth and grasp the opportunities that are presented to you.