WDYT of TTC 6 months after birth

[delphmoon]

Hi all,

Just looking for some opinions. DH and I are eager to TTC #2. We both have been wanting a big family.

When I suggested to my mum we were going to start TTC in January, my mum suggested it was a selfish thing to do as DD would be 16 months old (or there abouts if we got BFP straight away). Surprisingly my dad and some friends feels the same way

I have always imagined having kids close together, so they grow up together and can share similar interest, play and ofcourse fight (LOL).

What do you think? For those that have had babies close together- did it work out for you and did you body handle it ok?

TIA

[Kazmar]

Hey? Selfish?

I always say the best gift we gave our girls, was eachother

I say if both you and DH and ready, go for it! A lot of women have a massive fear for the 1st while ttc #2 or being pg with #2, I was one of these women

But how silly I was! The most AMAZING thing is watching them together

[Traveller]

I loved having my first two kids 15 months apart, and would have been delighted if we had them closer together but it took me a few months to concieve (we were trying from 6 weeks postnatal). It was great when they were babies as we were already in the swing of restless nights, nappies, etc. Now they are older they are best friends. Yes it is tiring but if it feels right for you, then go for it

[YoYo]

I wouldn't call it selfish, just your choice.

It's not my idea of a good time, but hey, that's my choice

Go for it if that is what you want

[Babyluv]

My sister and I are 18 months apart and so are my brother and I, we loved it growing up, we were always together, having adventures and my sister and I became best friends as teenagers. We are planning on ttc number 2 when this bub is about 6 months old, saying that though I may change my mind depending on how the birth goes!
I say go for it, it's not selfish at all.

[Maruschke]

Go for it! It isn't selfish at all. Actually I loved having a sister around my age (13 months apart). Good luck with TTC!

[skybie]

if thats wat u and ur hubby want to do then do it! stuff everyone else.
We have and we're so glad we did

[BeautifulMadness]

My two boys are 4 years and 18 mths and its great watching them grow and my eldest loves helping out with his brother....but i wouldnt have had them any closer together..

[~Hestia~]

I had hoped to start TTC when DS was around the same age, but as I didn't get AF back til his first birthday it was somewhat out of my hands! I really want my kids close too, I thought they could play together and while I'm used to interrupted nights and nappies I may as well continue with it lol.
At the end of the day it's YOUR choice. If that's what you and your DH want to do, don't worry about anyone else

[boobaloo]

i don't think it's selfish at all. but i'm not going to lie, it's hard work, especially in the toddler years. but the relationship the kids has is really beautiful to watch.
my body didn't handle it very well, i suffered very bad depression and anxiety as a result of no iron after dd was born, and have yet to lose any weight. but i'm still happy we did it the way we did.
good luck xo

[delphmoon]

Wow everyone! Thankyou soo much for all your posts. I can't reply individually but I have read them all so thankyou.

Thankyou for those that commented regarding the relationships between siblings when they are close together in age being enhanced as they grow up toegether. That is what DH and I expected...

And those that commented on it being hard work- we totally expect that too and figure while we are up changing nappies, juggling feeds etc we might as well keep going.

Also on the physical side of giving birth- thanks Tenibear for your comments and Boobaloo- just wondering if you knew you had an iron issue during or after birth?

Oh, and Chessel monster- I have had 2 AF's out of the 4 months- I completely forgot one needs AF back before TTC whoops...LOL..

Thanks everyone, your thoughts are appreciated

[catetay]

completely up to you and what suits your family, i would have thought! i'm the eldest of 6 kids in 9 years, 13 mths between myself and next brother, then all pretty close. we were close growing up, and all very close as adults. I had hoped for my chn to be around 18mths apart but didn't work out that way. i'm not sure why bringing a new life into the world is selfish, but i get that sometimes when i talk about ttc #3

[Beach Mama]

Agreed with everyone else! Mine are 17 mths apart, love each other dearly and I can see already how close they will be as they get older and what great friends they are. Do what is right for you and stuff what everyone else thinks

[~Stoked~]

I have been thinking about the 'selfish' comment that people like to make in regards to having babies, but really, when does anyone ever have babies for unselfish reasons? You have a baby because you want one. Full stop! So, therefore, everyone is selfish for having babies so go right ahead! Haha!
I fell pregnant again when DS was 4 months old. Unfortunately we lost that baby but I would have loved to have two so close together after having a ten year age gap between #1 and #2! We are TTC again and I really hope it happens soon

Goodluck!

[delphmoon]

Best of luck with TTC Stoked

My mum felt that I was being selfish because I wouldn't be able to focus and love DD as much

I would never ever stopped loving my DD...EVER!!!

I think mum has some issues she isn't telling me about as she really has an opinion on it. I said to her last night "you know mum, you have had 4 kids and there is only 6 years between the oldest and me (being the youngest), does that mean you love Louise less? "(Lou being the oldest)..Stumped mum abit but she is still passionate about me waiting for 5 years before TTC again...

Anyways, I have been having AF monthly since gumnut has been born but have missed the last 2 so it looks like it may be awhile before I can TTC

[Just Me]

I must be the most selfish person on earth then My first two are 12 months apart, my 2nd and 3rd are 15 months apart and my 3rd and this baby will be 16 months apart. I think my kids love having each other and they play so well. It has it's more difficult moments but I don't know what it would be like otherwise. There are some great advantages to having them so close - I don't have a school run in the mornings and afternoons, they all get on really really well, I've done some toilet training with them all together and they seem to benefit from doing it together. The only disadvantage that I can think of is that it has taken a slight toll on my body - I have done back to back pregnancy and breastfeeding for 4 years now (sometimes even overlapping) and I do have to have an iron supplement because I just don't make enough and somedays I do clean up an awful lot of poo but apart from that, I really enjoy having them so close together.

It's really about what you want and what you think you can handle. I know people who have much bigger age gaps and love that too. DH and I just decided what would be better for us and mother nature agreed so I was able to get pregnant quite quickly each time (part of the reason we didn't wait with DS - my 2nd - is because it took me 15 months of TTC for DD1 and we wanted to start sooner rather than later in case it took a while again).

Sometimes the hardest thing to do in parenting is decide what is best for you, your family and your kids and tune out to everyone else's opinions especially if they are the opinions of people that you really respect. I didn't think that having DS took anything away from my relationship with DD1 though I did worry about whether I was doing the right thing while I was pregnant a lot. I think that is normal no matter what age gap you have.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do and I hope that everyone will be happy for you and respect your choice

[*LittleMissSummer*]

Our bubs are exactly the same age and I feel EXACTLY the same way you do, though my DP doesnt feel the same way

I originally wanted to TTC #2 in Feb but the other half wasnt convinced he wants to wait 2-3 years but he says if it is to happen sooner than its meant to be.
I haven't told anyone in my family only my SIL and she at first was like dont worry what others think do what you want to do and then when i thought i was pregnant it was "it will be alot of hard work..blah blah blah" and i understand that but being a mum is all i see in my life at the moment. I LOVE every moment i am with my DD and yes there are times where i have a hard time but they are VERY rare and thats usually when i am already stressed and it just builds up.

FWIW, i have pcos and my cycles are very irregular and i only got one AF and then O'd that month and had one accident and fell pregnant lol

But yes do what you and your DH want to do dont let anybody tell you otherwise, no one can tell you how long to wait.

GL

[Enchanted]

Anyways, I have been having AF monthly since gumnut has been born but have missed the last 2 so it looks like it may be awhile before I can TTC

Is there a possibility you could already be pg?