thread: Frustrated - need support

  1. #1
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    Feb 2008
    Adelaide SA
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    Frustrated - need support

    I was never a person who needed to do anything about my weight. Before my son was born i would eat anything barely exercise (and i mean i would exercise once a year) and would be just fine but now its a totally different story.

    I have about 5-6kg on my pre preg weight but ideally I would like to lose 10kg. I have been seriously exercising for around 2 weeks now and everytime i get on the scales i seem to be putting on weight rather than losing it. I feel like i may as well sit on my bum as at least then i didn't put on weight! Its so frustrating and my self esteem is rock bottom at the moment. I look at photo's of when dh and i got together and i want to cry. I dont know how how he finds me attractive anymore.

    I guess iv just hit a wall, iv never had to lose weight before in my life and i kinda thought it would be easy. DH is a fitness fanatic so he has been trying to motivate me to keep going and as my fitness increases i will be able to burn more calories but it still feels hopeless, especially from him as he is so skinny and can eat whatever he wants. Plus i cant really change my diet coz he refuses to buy low fat stuff Anyway, not sure what the point of this was but i just feel frustrated so if anyone has any support or advice id love to hear it.

    Thanks for listening!

  2. #2
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    Dec 2005
    In Bankworld with Barbara
    14,222

    It is really hard when you try to do all the right things and you don't seem to be getting anywhere. Are you BF? if you are then it could be likely that with all the sudden exercising that you've sent your body into a fight or flight mode - it's basically like you body has said 'oh no! she's trying to lose weight and I need those fat stores to make milk' so your body will hang on to it kwim? What you probably should do is keep a food diary and write down everything that goes into your mouth during the day, make sure you drink at least 2lts of water per day and also look online for a daily calorie calculator. Some women do find that their milk will drop off a bit when on a diet so you need to make sure that you aren't denying yourself food if you are hungry - there are loads of other ways to snack healthily and keep your metabolism going. I know weight watchers do have a breastfeeding program if your are into that sort of thing. But if you take it slowly, exercise at a moderate level each day (your DH will be able to help you with that) then the weight will come off and the long term success at keeping it off will be better.

  3. #3
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    I wasn't able to breastfeed but thanks for the info Trillian. I dont have any excuse to not go hard on the old treadmill,

  4. #4
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    Dec 2005
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    That's OK, everything else you can still take on board only now you don't have to factor the BF in. It is really important that you have snacks during the day and don't skip meals. Make sure you don't eat later than 7.30 at night is a great rule I live by as you don't want to go to bed with a great heavy meal in your stomach that wont digest properly, so maybe even try having a larger meal at lunch time to get you through the rest of the day with only a few small snacks (instead of dealing with that dreaded mid-afternoon slump) and have light meal for dinner. Another thing too that might sound really gross is make sure you give yourself a good clean out and really hook into the metamucil as some people can have up to 7kg of undigested food in their bowel and it makes a huge difference if you go daily.

  5. #5
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    Jul 2008
    Melbourne
    3,244

    trying to lose weight can be so frustrating & depressing!

    i don't know about you, but when i was losing weight i followed a few things to help keep me going (sorry if you're already doing them!)-

    • only weigh yourself a maximum of once a week - i saw a personal trainer for a while & he even thought once a week was too often! he preferred once a fortnight.

    • weigh yourself at the same time each time you do weigh - i.e. in the morning before breakfast, wearing clothes/not wearing clothes

    • allow for hormonal changes

    • take your measurements - because you may be shrinking, but just not seeing the results on the scales. it's really rewarding to see something like your waist or thighs shrinking! again, don't take measurements too often - i used to do it once a month.

    • focus on a healthier lifestyle over weight loss - because all that hard work with exercise that you do IS having a positive effect on your overall health

    • include weights as well as cardio - it's a great balance & should help with both fitness & weight loss

    • track what you're eating (and burning off!) with a website like calorie king - it's good to see where those calories come from & also can help give you other targets...i used to use it to give myself goals such as fibre intake... i knew i needed more fibre in my diet so for a few weeks i'd use that as my primary motivator rather than total calories. it kept me interested & motivated & by default i ate better (more vegies & wholegrains).

    sorry for the long post. it's all stuff that's buzzing round in my head at the moment cos i lost weight & then put it back on...and now being PG i'm putting on a bit extra but i'm really keen to get back on the wagon!

    good luck

  6. #6
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    Feb 2008
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    Thanks for the advice!

    Trillian Id love to not eat after 730 but usually by the time dh comes home Lachlan is usually ready for bed so by the time we get past his bedtime routine its 730 and we haven't started on dinner. I need to get a bit more organized during the day. Ill get onto the metamucil that it quite yucky about the bowels.

    Sloane thanks for the tips. I know i weigh myself way too much. We have a wii fit and everytime i get on it it tells me i have gone up again. GRR so annoying. Might just weigh myself once a fortnight and go from there. I will def get myself measured up as well.

  7. #7
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    Jan 2008
    1,413

    isabel!

    Chin up my dear!!

    my tips.
    Maybe join weight watchers online.. its fantastic... then you know how much you should and shouldnt be eating.. and if you exercise you get more points to eat. its brilliant i have lost now nealry 15kg..


    Drink plenty of water.. change to decaf coffee.. drink green tea, and try to eat 6 smaller meals a day. Then its not an issue eating after 730... it all gets broken down regardless, especially if you are exercising.

    Good luck!

  8. #8
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    Oct 2006
    By the sea
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    Hey hon, what kind of excercise are you doing and what are you eating?

  9. #9
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    Im doing interval training on the treadmill at the moment. Iv worked up to 4km an hour for one minute then 8km an hour for one minute and im absolutely buggered after 20 minutes. Im only starting out though so thats pretty good for me. last week i was doing 2 minutes of 4 km an hour and then 1 minute of either 8km an hour or 10km an hour for about 4 minutes or so and that was getting easier so i added more running. I also go for walks with the pram if i can but thats not very regular. I only really mange to exercise after DS goes to sleep after 7pm. I try to get on the treadmill 4 times a week.

    In terms of eating im not that good. I sometimes eat breakfast if i have time ( i know its bad) which is usually 2 pieces of toast with butter and jam. lunch is whatever i can get my hands on. If im out i try and have sushi or something but if i am bad like today i had a yiros (terrible i know). If im at home i try and make a samdwich or maybe have toast with cheese and tomato or salada with cheese and tomato. i snack a fair bit too, i am trying really hard not to buy things like biscuits coz if they are in the cupboard i will eat them. dinner is usually pasta or chicken and veg., i think my main prob is snacking on bad things and not eating enough in the mornings and lunch so i am soooo hungry that i wil grab whatever is easy to munch on while looking after ds.

  10. #10
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    Oct 2006
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    Ok cool, just off to teach a class now but i'll come back...do you use the tready at home or in a gym? Do you have any other equipment? Weights or anything?

  11. #11
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    We have a tready at home. DH is a pretty good runner so he invested in a pretty pricey one that is really good. No other exercise equipment really. There are a few weights but they have been living outside as we have no room in the house so i wouldn't really want to touch them. Could see if DH can clean them up for me. We also have a wii fit.

  12. #12
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    Nov 2008
    Victoria
    507

    Hi,

    Did you end up checking out calorieking??

    A few things that I did, that I think were essential for me -

    Make sure you are eating enough! Sounds silly, but if you are not feeding your body the fuel it needs you wont burn calories. The min anyone should have is 1200 cals (no less), obviously based on your height, weight and activity level this will be upward of 1200.

    Educate yourself - I had no idea about calories I was actually consuming, and it was far more that I would have guessed. Sounds like a pain but record for a while and you will be surprised at how little or how much you are eating.

    Find an exercise you enjoy, for me it was kickboxing. I hate the gym and would refuse to go. I also completed C25K, if you havent heard of it it is a podcast to 'learn' how to run. I have never run in my life and in 9 weeks was able to run 5km without stopping!! You can do this on a tread mill it doesnt have to be outside.

    Set goals, dont weigh yourself all the time, and take measurements.. while the scales might say one thing measurements can tell a whole other story.

    Cut back on salt and drink lots of water..!!!

  13. #13
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    I did have a look at calorie kind and signed up but they had to send me a email so i could finish the registration and that took ages to come through. I need to go look if it has come through, thank you for reminding me. I need to start my own private mantra "drink more water" he he, im hopeless with water.

    I am starting a food diary tomorrow as i dont think i eat that much but im sure all the snacking adds up and i dont even realise

  14. #14
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    Oct 2006
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    Hey, i'm sorry I haven't been back with any help or advice but i'm moving at the moment and i'm flat out. I will be back I promise...hope it's all going well

  15. #15
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    Feb 2008
    Adelaide SA
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    Thanks CQ! I have been sick this week so am having a rest this week and getting back into it next week. Cant wait to hear your advice when you have time!