I am a neat freak too, to some extent I had to let that go when Ashton came along. My house is pretty much always tidy but not the the spotless extent it was before.

I do it by teaching the older 2 to pack away what they are playing with BEFORE they play with something else.

Then when they are in bed, and Ash is either asleep or happy playing I clean up. I do this EVERY night, if I leave it even ONE night it takes longer the next day because the kids are up and I am busy.

Once you get in the swing of it, it's actually quite easy