Hi Venus,

I am currently going thru the donor thing with donor embies. I have been on IVF for 3yrs now and have gone thru using my eggs and DH sperm, then donor egg and DH sperm , then my egg and BIL sperm to no avail and 6attempts. I have had councelling about all as you must do when receiving donor. I guess we are all different on how we view things. Of course everyone first wants a biol child but after conselling and lots of soul searching etc i came to realise that what we really wanted was a family whether it be biol , adopted or thru donation. I am extremely comfortable with the whole process now - to me you will carry this child, you and your DH will go thru the pregnancy together just like normal, you will bear this child, breastfeed it, spend sleepless nights and your lives will be filled with so much joy that only a newborn can bring. This child of yours will be both yours regardless of where the sperm came from, you DH sounds like a lovely man and no i don't think you should take fate and have no children, your desire to have them sounds strong, this will not just disappear. I know for me the desire is soooo strong and i know we will be parents i just have to be patient. Venus have you done your conselling yet? IF not this may help you and there are alot of books avail to read about receiving and being donors. I have a friend who has a little boy thru donor egg and her DH sperm, she feels so blessed and she is and always will be Denzels mummy no matter what, when her donor offered eggs to my friend her comment was i quote" I don't love my eggs" & "look at it this way im giving you one ingredient you need to make this child and the rest is up to you" - Venus i know you will find peace with your decision and it is a wonderful gift you have been given. Good luck sweetie - trust me all will be okay - trust your feelings and go with your heart and all will work out.