Advice on having a second baby...

[chody47]

Oooh, very exciting Blondie! I hope everything settles nicely and you are able to start TTC soon. We're gonna start trying in the next few months too. Perhaps we will be BB and that them this time?

[Kazzo]

It can be very exciting to be at the point of starting to try for another baby and like I said in our babybuddies thread emotions are such a big factor. Can I ask, did you think of TTC before you ever thought that it would be good for Aidan? Does that make sense?

Oh and Chody, how exciting that your getting ready to try again. Will be quietly stalking you again soon I think

[Blondie]

Thanks Chody yeah it would be exciting to be BB! Best of luck to you! I will be keeping en eye out for the annoucement

Kazzo - well I have been feeling clucky for a while - even before Aidan started going through the naughty phase but to be honest I was ignoring the signals that I was giving myself silly I know, but I would just put it down to hormones, or the fact that I was at work and missed Aidan. I think I was scared to feel clucky as I was scared of birth. My birth was quite traumatic for me and this time around I will be choosing to have a c-section and I guess I was just scared of the unknown and scared of the re-cuperation of c-section etc...and I guess that was clouding my vision. I have now come to the conclusion that I am not scared of a c-section and I want to have another baby because I want to complete my family, not because Aidan "needs" a sibling and not because relo's are telling me to have them close. I want to do it for me

I talked to Hubby last night and I made him explain to me the reason's why he wanted another, because I basically told him that having another child isn't going to "fix Aidan's tanty's" etc etc so anyway he had a think about it and then came back to me and said that he wants Aidan to have a sibling so that they can grow up together, look out for each other and to have a playmate to share experiences and life with made me happy to hear from him, after he had time to reflect on it.

The Flying Butter bought some things to my attention and to be honest I felt completely and utterly selfish I never intended to use Aidan as an excuse to have another, I guess in my own mind I was going over the consequences of my actions i.e. Money, Family life, how it would effect Aidan, whether he would like a sibling etc....when what I really should have been doing is listening to my internal voice.

[Kazzo]

I think you have made up your mind and put good thought into it. You don't need to worry about feeling like you are using Aidans behaviour to want another baby, may have just been thinking of it as another reason to start trying and now you know that it is not the real reason, just a thought that you had and TBH I have a friend that is hoping their baby due in June helps quieten down their DS so your not the first to think it and wont be the last but you know it is not the reason you want to start TTC now you just need to make an appointment and then you can get started

[chody47]

Good to hear you've made up your mind Blondie - I'll keep my eye out for your announcement!!! Mine wont be too soon yet, we are currrently planning on starting to TTC in May. We've already got one a month after Christmas, we don't need one a month before too (although, if we get UTD first cycle #2 will be due 3 weeks after DD's 2nd birthday....)

[Kazzo]

Blondie, I was going to say to maybe go and chat with the girls in the preTTC thread. Maybe they might be able to help you talk through things too.

[Lolpigs]

Thanks Chody yeah it would be exciting to be BB! Best of luck to you! I will be keeping en eye out for the annoucement

Kazzo - well I have been feeling clucky for a while - even before Aidan started going through the naughty phase but to be honest I was ignoring the signals that I was giving myself silly I know, but I would just put it down to hormones, or the fact that I was at work and missed Aidan. I think I was scared to feel clucky as I was scared of birth. My birth was quite traumatic for me and this time around I will be choosing to have a c-section and I guess I was just scared of the unknown and scared of the re-cuperation of c-section etc...and I guess that was clouding my vision. I have now come to the conclusion that I am not scared of a c-section and I want to have another baby because I want to complete my family, not because Aidan "needs" a sibling and not because relo's are telling me to have them close. I want to do it for me

I talked to Hubby last night and I made him explain to me the reason's why he wanted another, because I basically told him that having another child isn't going to "fix Aidan's tanty's" etc etc so anyway he had a think about it and then came back to me and said that he wants Aidan to have a sibling so that they can grow up together, look out for each other and to have a playmate to share experiences and life with made me happy to hear from him, after he had time to reflect on it.

The Flying Butter bought some things to my attention and to be honest I felt completely and utterly selfish I never intended to use Aidan as an excuse to have another, I guess in my own mind I was going over the consequences of my actions i.e. Money, Family life, how it would effect Aidan, whether he would like a sibling etc....when what I really should have been doing is listening to my internal voice.

That sounds awesome So glad you got it sorted with hubby and yourself. I think its really important to want it yourself as your child wont thank you like Flying Butter said, least not at first haha!

I wish you all the best with your TTC journey. Hubby and I talked and decided to start trying once bubs is 6 months old. Just because Lilly took a short time to concieve dosent mean it will next time, and it means she will be around 2 years old when the new baby comes we both want a few kids we just werent sure how close to have them together. We both decided we wanted 3, and that we both would not be able to cope with the sleep deprevation if DD got to sleeping through then we had another, so we decided to just keep rolling with the lack of sleep

[Blondie]

Thanks for all your support ladies

Kazzo - I never thought to do that! Thanks for the tip love!

Lolpigs - good luck on TTC in June!! Very exciting yeah I agree, just because the first one was conceived quickly doesn't mean that the second will be but I'm sure you'll have no trouble at all

I will be sprinkling baby dust for you and Chody!!

[Lolpigs]

Thank you! I've had a bit of a down moment, my mother has shaken my excitement at having another baby. I dont think she meant it intentionally but when I mentioned having another sibling for DD she was like, oh no you dont want to do that now, she needs all the attention for awhile, gives you a break you dont want to be like your cousin blah blah

Major sadface. Here I was excited and now I feel like the worst person ever and that I'm taking something away from my DD

My DH tells me not to worry, that we will just do what is right for us, but now I have that nagging doubt.

[Kazzo]

Lolpigs. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks about when you should have another baby. If it feels right for you then go for it with a big happy smile.