OK I will try not to waffle on too much but here goes. DS is throwing the most hideous tantrums and I have no idea how to handle them. basically he has a complete breakdown sobbing and crying saying things like "I just can't stop crying" or " My whole world is ruined" weird things like that. Usually they start over the same thing him not getting his way but they are very quickly getting out of control where he has started hitting, kicking and punching and walking or rolling back and forth saying the same thing over and over. There is absolutely no way to stop him and this goes on for 15-45 min.

Now I admit I have been blessed as we never had the terrible twos and 98% of the time he is an absolutely fabulous, wonderful (if at times kooky) kid but these little breakdowns are starting to worry me. I had never seen anything like it until we moved 3mths ago and basically he was very sad and emotional for about 2wks. We did lots of hugs/cuddles and reassurence. then when he seemed to be over that I enrolled him in daycare which admittedly was not the best idea as the staff were very inexperienced and the children very unruly. On his first week there we were told he had gotten very upset when he couldn't eat his lunch with the other students and had pinched one of the teachers (before this he had never ever hit, kicked or bit another child or adult ever) Almost every other day he would come hom saying he had had a bad day, that he had had to have a cry etc. And I'm wondering if this new behaviour started then. I have contacted his old daycare (which was wonderful) and they said occassionally if he was tired or unwell he would get emotional and they would let him have a lie down and 15 min later he would be back to normal. So after this huge long ramble, what should I do????

We have tried talking gentle with him, have tried ignoring him, today has been the worst day where he struck out and punched me and DH and I'm sad to admit we smacked him (which we don't normally do and I'm still feeling terribly guilty about) and it didn't help either. Also today while he was crying, hitting and kicking at us he wouldn't let us go and kept saying "don't leave me all alone" (which we have never done?) which made me feel even worse. Any advice, is this normal 4 yo tanty behaviour? Oh also is it normal for them afterwards to make up stories like - I was sad because I'm scared of monsters, I don't like houses or I don't like the colour blue (seriously this is what he said this morning when we were talking to him about what happened?

Thanks so much for reading all of this, any any help would be greatly appreciated