Thanks so much for the hugs and advice, today was a rough day and I've been racking my brain to try and figure out what was different. No different foods, in fact the first tant happened before I even got out of bed. But as usual he turns arounds and surprises us tonight by eating all his dinner without complaint and then offering to put himself to bed (which he hasn't don for ages!) I am so proud of him! So as long as we don't start the day with another tanty I have a little toy for him in the morining to reward him.

I have tried to talk to him about why he gets so upset and we always have a light-hearted debrief when we've settled but I don't know if it's working

Thanks Dee for your comment, a paed is the next thing I was thinking of too as he has some other obsessive/compulsive traits and his cousin has asperges (sp) Xander is the same he will be excellent for days on end and then wham bad day again. We do the lie in bed until your not feeling sad anymore but now he is getting defient too (bit of a testosterone surge at the moment I think) and keeps running out and hitting things.